That Which Cannot Heal
by Elegy Eirwyn
Summary: Kamui wanted to argue and sneer and pretend that he's still allowed to be young and carefree. He wanted Subaru to watch him with a half-smile as he tore up his enemies and claimed to be heartless.
1. The Wounds of Youth

I. The Wounds of Youth

_Twins, they call us. _

Clack, clack, tack…old-fashioned shoes on unfortunate flooring.

_Good thing he's following me because I don't think I have the goddamn patience to turn around and get him-_

They arrive at a door. A locked door, of course, because when one wears so many belts and boots and other utilitarian items, one can only expect to find themselves in front of locked doors.

He fumbles for a minute looking through his numerous pockets –_If that little self-absorbed pig Fuuma stole it while he was busy manhandling me earlier I swear to God I'll – _and finds it, with no small annoyance, in the pocket that he always puts it in.

Finally the door is pushed open (assertively)

_Did I dent the wall?_

…_Do I really care…?_

And home, at least home for the last few years, greeted the two with its usual melancholy greyness. It's a small room, and very compartmentalized – such is a post-apocalyptic lifestyle. There is a small bed coated with rough blankets that were probably roughly made. There is no other furniture, because nothing else is needed. Only a yawning window adorns the far wall. It hisses as the rain hits it.

_Home sweet fucking home how I hate this place whywhywhy-_

Carelessly, blinded, he put his first foot through the doorway and then the second he brought through too quickly –

-_whywhy can't we leave right now it's not fair-_

And of course there was the raised floorboard that would have otherwise be glaringly obvious -

-_the ground? I'm on the ground? I'm on the ground and it's just not fair whywhywhy isn't it ever fair?_

_They call us twins._

Slowly and all too gracefully another pair of feet safely crossed the rouge floorboard.

Somehow, Oh! Somehow, the sting and shock is more painful than two years of loneliness and acid rain and an insane clone tearing at his arm and even Fuuma's awful awful truths. And he sits there, against the hard wall and the harder floor –

_I swear I come in and out this room five times a day, and Subaru hasn't even been here once – _

_Twins. Twins by fate, not by age. And with age comes wisdom. _

And he can't get up. He is shaking, shaking and he can feel his face _oh no God I'm too old for this _painting itself crimson.

_Stupid stupid Fuuma why did he have to? Why did he have to be? I thought that – I thought that maybe – I hoped he – he shouldn't have told me. No, he should have told me earlier. WHY didn't he tell me? Back when – when – _

"I'm sorry."

It wasn't the apology he really wanted to hear, but it was soft and protective right in his ear and suddenly he was aware of Subaru's arms pressed tightly around his frame.

"I didn't mean to leave you. I didn't want you to have to grow up so fast and so alone, little brother."

He trembled in short bursts and tucked his head into Subaru's shoulder. Maybe there, he hoped, Subaru wouldn't notice the _liquid asteroids _tears heavily rimming his eyes.

"It was awful, wasn't it? I can tell. You fretted over me day and night, I know it. What a good brother I have. I am lucky."

Subaru began stroking his back, in hopes to quell the shaking.

"It hurts, doesn't it, little brother? I know it hurts. But I promise that someday it will hurt less."

Kamui wanted to argue and sneer and pretend that he's still allowed to be young and carefree. He wanted Subaru to watch him with a half-smile as he tore up his enemies and claimed to be heartless, or at least ruthless. If only for a second, he wanted to be the troublesome twin that is quick to anger, quick to excitement, and secretly all too quick to trust.

And maybe then he understood the weariness in his brother's eyes; he finally realized the true burden of heartbreak.

He understood what makes one old.

_Twins by similar circumstance._

After an epoch of trembling and painpainpain, he was finally able to lie limp like a corpse in Subaru's arms. He kept his head buried in the familiar fabric of Subaru's cloak, worried that his face was glowing pink and wet. Subaru knew it was.

He had felt the protruding knobs of Kamui's spine, and as he pulled away from the embrace, he felt the sharp corners of ribs through Kamui's clothing.

"Kamui?"

Deprived of Subaru's cloak, Kamui had let his face fall into his hands and his hair fall over his brow.

"Mmph?"

"How long has it been since you fed?"

"Not as long as you."

He playfully poked his younger brother in the side. He was rewarded with a slight twitch and a small "Hey-."

"I was hibernating. That doesn't count."

Subaru gathered Kamui's hair in his hands and gently tugged his head up to face him. He saw what he expected – big, round eyes plated and shiny with anguish, usually pale cheeks flushed and lightly glowing, small, ovular lips pressed tightly together, messy hair used as an attempted curtain to hide the weakness – and it was so incredibly lovely. Tragedy was so infamously becoming.

"I'm fine." Kamui whispered. Timidity laced his voice. He pleaded, even, "We should just go now."

Subaru shook his head with quietly inarguable sternness. "We don't know what the next world holds. I know you're tired. Do you need me to go and get -."

"NO!" Kamui reached up, a little less pink and embarrassed after his outburst, and grabbed Subaru's hands. "It's dangerous here. I – I'll go. I'll be quick."

Subaru watched with both sadness and maybe a little amusement as Kamui bounded across the room and threw open the window. An incipient smile softly grew on his face. At least, he figured, his silly Brother had the sense to put on his cloak and hood before he jumped.

_Maybe he still has a little bit of rambunctious innocence. Only young vampires like to show off like that. _


	2. The Shepherd

_Thank you for reading. If you are interested, this is a companion piece to Crimson Stars and Distant Skies.  Also, a review would bring me immeasurable joy.  
><em>

* * *

><p>II. The Shepherd<p>

The ground looks as if giants tread upon it in their anguish. The bones and spines of buildings jut up into the air past their rotting flesh, twisted and broken and empty.

_Perhaps emptiness is better than pain. _

And so Kamui leaps across the piles of cement ligaments and steel innards. He is a black blur, an onyx _gem _glittering darkly in an onslaught of acid diamonds.

_The only beautiful things in a world of despair are those that are deadly. _

He moves quickly away from the cemetery and into a remote region – a number of hills now full of deep caves inhabited only by bandits and thieves.

_Not that Kamui would really care about who he ate. Morals were fickle and subject to change. He was simply concerned about revealing his true nature to his comrades. _

He stops. The entrance to the cave is only about six feet high, the inside is inscrutable. But Kamui can smell the scent of life thick and crimson in the air.

He lets his cloak fall silently to the floor. He slips into the shadows, barely discernible against the cave wall. Only his eyes flicker, two fireflies dancing in the night.

* * *

><p>Subaru padded – quite softly - across the room and shut the window that Kamui had left open. He sat down on the very edge of the very stiff bed, looking at the hard space around him. Too many edges and corners and canvas and locks – he wasn't jealous of his younger brother's sparse existence. Instead, he pined for the painless, numb years wrapped up in warmth and magic tucked safely underwater.<p>

_This world is far too cruel._

Rap rap rap – assertive knocking on an unfortunate door.

He glided across the floor (strongly conscience of the jutting floorboard that earlier ensnared his brother) and reached for the faded knob.

_Would Kamui want me to answer this? He wants everyone to think that we've already left._

_Kamui does not consider his comrades here his friends._

_The poor fool. _

With a guilty twist, Subaru wrenched open the door.

"Fuuma-san?"

* * *

><p>He can sense them further down into the cave, he can feel the heat, warmth and hate of two presences.<p>

_Maybe a man and a woman?_

He is right. Long before he can see them, as he is moving almost glacially in order to remain silent, he can hear their rotting voices.

"How much do we have left?" A harsh, demanding baritone.

_Water thieves. Rotten water stealing bastards. _

"Maybe enough for two days." A higher voice, though equally as harsh.

_And from whom, after that, will you steal life from?_

"And if we don't give any to the old bastards?"

_Bastards that do not protect their kin. _

"Enough for four days." There is amusement lacing her voice. And his.

Kamui sneers and moves in close enough to see their faces and identify their blood types.

_Perhaps this will be relaxing._

* * *

><p><em>It feels like little bonfires at the end of each finger. <em>

He let all of his fingers extend into sharp claws and his eyes become smoldering embers.

Fuuma stood in the doorway, his large hand on his large head, his cheek still red, puffy and unhealed from his previous altercation with Kamui. His small orange sunglasses did little to hide the shininess of his eyes.

_Does he really have a spare pair of those…things…_

"Ah, Subaru-san, please calm down. I'm just here to-."

"To _what? _Haven't you done enough already?"

And then he had that smile on his face, that awful, self-assured, carefree smile that used to belong to his brother.

Thief.

"Has anyone ever seen you like this, Subaru-san? I heard from my dear older brother that you are the calm one! Has Kamui seen you like this?"

It had been a long time since Subaru had forced his eyebrows down into a firm slope and made his lips downturn into a dramatic U. He had forgotten how hard being mad was. Or how satisfying it proved to be.

* * *

><p>He goes for the woman first.<p>

_Plain clothes, plain face, skin scarred by acid. _

He registers, before he whips his long claws against her head, that she has poorly kept mahogany hair and watery eyes.

_Such is a god that grants others the ability to fly. _

With a sharp smack she hits the stone wall and collapses to the ground. Not dead, no, because a dead human is no good.

_Strong body, weak stomach. _

Kamui turns to face the man that made no move to protect his woman. He feels both her blood dripping down his fingers and another fearful pair of eyes adhered to him. Slowly, menacingly and altogether intentionally, he lifts one of his fingers and licks her blood clean off.

_Such is a god that can strike fear into the eyes of enemies. _

He becomes a fierce wind and very soon the man is cut across the neck and face.

_Thick red lines drawn like an ash cross on his forehead. _

The man cannot move, only watch in disbelief as Kamui shreds his skin into ribbons of confession. Soon he is on his knees, the roughness in the floor tearing small holes in pants, his hands planted on either side and face upturned to the _altar._

_Now I am become death;_

_The destroyer of worlds. _

* * *

><p>"Is Kamui here?"<p>

"No."

"Not very talkative, are we? Oh well, that's fine. I wanted to talk to you, not him."

"No."

Fuuma pushed past him into the room, ignoring the violence gushing from his frown.

He settled himself on the edge of the bed as if he's been in the room before.

"What was your relationship with my brother?" Subaru was directly in front of Fuuma then, so quickly that he doubted the fool was able to see him move.

Finally the smile cracked.

Subaru lifted a long finger to Fuuma's neck.

"Answer me."

"Subaru-san really is scary!"

Subaru pushed his long finger into Fuuma's neck, enough to cause a vermilion stream to trickle down.

"I am torn, Subaru-san, in between loving two people. Have you ever experienced this? Loving two people so much, but not being allowed to love them at the same time?"

Subaru let his fingers drop and retract into human digits.

_His lovely twin and his lovely lover. _

Fuuma buried his head in his hands.

_Subaru's heart felt like it was on fire._

"Who did you choose, Subaru? Have you chosen? Is one love better than the other? Familial love – my reckless older brother, or that rare love that exists outside of your family – which is better?"

"Stop."

"I have chosen, Subaru-san. Which is why I came here to apologize beforehand."

* * *

><p>Kamui uses one hand to raise the man up by his neck. The blood he smells from him is vile and sickly, but it will serve its purpose.<p>

_CRACK._

Something has changed, something massive has shifted. He can feel a tangible change of magic in the air, as if…

_Someone has arrived. _

He lets the man fall to the ground, clutching his permanently disfigured face in his hands.

_Someone powerful, someone important, someone…_

_Seishirou._

The power is pulsating from the government building, from this distance Kamui cannot determine exactly where in the building that it's coming from. But instincts and the heavy pressure of dread tell him that Seishirou would not have landed anywhere besides the reservoir.

_I am the good shepherd…_

And in a flash of darkness he is gone, stopping only to reclaim the cloak that he left at the entrance of the cave.

_Once again he is dancing among the carcasses of buildings, and yet this dance is more frenzied than his last. Now he has become a blackbird, turning and twisting his dark small body through the rain and cement. _

He is sure that Subaru is already where Seishirou is, and so descends to the lowest level of the building.

_I am the good shepherd…_

He can only hope that he can grab hold of his twin and disappear before-

The giant steel doors have been blown away. The entrance to the reservoir appears like the opening to an oven, glowing red and waving in the heat. The water is molten gold and the ceiling a scary imitation of a blood sunset.

He nearly runs in the room, desperate and scared, but a magically energetic wave drives him back. He tries once again, and succeeds in getting through the doorway.

_Searing eyes and feverish skin, air so energetic and exacerbated he can only see a red red void like his eyes have been branded with a blazing iron._

He feels breath on the side of his neck, breath that is sweetly cool in the turbulent air around him. He turns to face it, but can naught see but the crimson air.

"Kamui." The voice is by his other ear now, soft and so so sharp.

"So Fuuma delivered. How rare."

_I am the good shepherd…_

* * *

><p><em>CRACK.<em>

Subaru felt something shift, felt something massive change. He could feel the tangible change of magic in the air, as if…

_Seishirou has arrived. _

Fuuma's head was still in his hands.

"I can't let you leave this room until-." Fuuma's voice cracked.

Subaru dashed towards the door, but found it blocked by a powerful enchantment.

"How? What did you do?"

Fuuma stood, still attempting to obscure his face with one hand. He walked towards the window, rippling as he passed through the boundaries of the enchantment.

"I chose my brother. Just like you, Subaru-san."

Subaru raced forward towards Fuuma, vainly banging on the invisible walls of his enclosure.

"Why? What's happening? _What did you DO?"_

"My wish and my brother's favor came at the same price."

"NO!" Subaru fell to his knees, his tears painting poetry on his face,

"He will be given a chance to forego his fate. Kamui, I mean. But he won't. He loves you too much."

And, much like Kamui before him, Fuuma threw open the window with saddened confidence and jumped into the poison air.

* * *

><p>"You haven't changed a bit, Kamui. And still as strong as ever, I presume?"<p>

_Where is Subaru if he's already killed Subaru –_

"How is Subaru-kun? I can't wait to see him later."

_He can feel Seishirou shift behind him, but still cannot see. He moves his arms to slash –_

Kamui's arms are heavy, heavier than smashed cinder blocks or the guilt and fear from tens of lifetimes. Kamui's arms are heavy with searing restraints.

"He he. Don't answer, that's fine. I just thought you might like to know that Fuuma led me here."

If Kamui's eyes could grow any wider, they would. But already they are stretched wide in a useless attempt to see around the pressure.

Now Seishirou is right in front of him, running a thin finger down his cheek.

_I am the good shepherd…_

"There are a couple of ways to kill a vampire that I've discovered during my travels. I'm sure you know of a few, Kamui. Starvation, of course, but that takes a while."

He roughly jabbed Kamui in the stomach, causing the boy to collapse onto his knees in shock.

"Decapitation," slowly he drew a line with his finger across Kamui's neck, "but that's no fun."

"And my personal favorite. The most fitting, I think. Exsanguination – bleeding to death."

Kamui had enough pride to growl.

"And how, you ask, do I accomplish that when a vampire can heal itself within seconds?"

He grabbed Kamui's neck and pulled him close to his face.

"I keep the wound open with my own hands until all Subaru's precious blood is on the floor.

_I am the good shepherd – _

"But I'll give you a choice. Fuuma insisted that I give you a choice."

_I _am _the good Shepherd –_

"Will you become your brother's replacement? Will you die in his stead? I will accept it, just this once."

_- The good Shepherd giveth His life for the sheep._

The air is still hot and his eyes are still blind, but Kamui can see a crystal light in his brother's future. He can see Subaru's grievous freedom.

"Yes."


	3. Requiem and Interlude

_I apologize for how short this chapter is, however it felt complete at this point. I wouldn't want to ruin the structure of the chapter or throw off the tone by making it longer than it is. Please let me know what you think in a review. Also, very soon, this story will be continuing in another story of mine named Crimson Stars and Distant Skies. Please take a look if you are interested. _

* * *

><p>III. Requiem and Interlude<p>

_Minor chords, minor chords rumbling low and sweet and horrible. Trapped in a glass sphere, minor chords making every second a year of dissonance and salt pillar tears and cathedral echoes as you wait, wait knowing that what you wait for is the darkened cross upon the hill – not for you, no, not for you – if only it was for you –_

_There are thorns, your face is streaming and dripping with thorns and thorns and glittering crystal sharp sharp thorns and the thought in your head don't make much sense anymore. No, there are only the minor chords reverberating in the cathedral of your mind._

_There is only the Requiem in the cathedral of your mind and a cross upon the hill._

_Your hands are purple and raw from beating on your prison walls, your voice is splintering from yelling and crying and pleading for a miracle. _

_You remember his initial awkwardness when he became your twin. His coldness, his seeming selfishness, his bumbling and embarrassed and denying way of caring for you without wanting you to know-_

_You remember the first time he smiled at you – the first time you had seen him smile – in a world full of light and kindness that was now much too far away. You had, for the first time, called his name casually. You could not help but say his name with familiarity. And he had smiled –_

_Then you recall the way he would stand, one hip higher than the other as if he were standing on uneven ground. He was. So were you. And how elevated his chin was – graceful, proud, a little naïve – _

_You relive the surprise of seeing him cry for the first time, the light sniffling and the hand over his face, trying to hide the traitorous tears collecting around the rims of his eyes -_

_And then you remember how grumpy he was when you tried to wake him up early. And how meticulous he was about how he made his bed. And how angry he became when someone threatened what was his. And how irritated he became when he wasn't the strongest. And how scared he became when you were sad -_

_And you remember the little puffs he would hum when he was tired, and the way he would toss his shoes in the farthest corner, and the fact that he left the windows opened when it rained and the songs he would sing when he thought you couldn't hear him and how he waited for YOU –_

_And now you are here and he is gone. You are alone. _

_CRACK._

Subaru felt something shift, felt something massive change. He could feel the tangible change of magic in the air, as if…

The magic imprisonment shattered like _tearing the veil _a sheet of ice struck by a bullet. The shards dissipated in a fizzle of colors and Subaru was left in a heap of hopelessness and urgency. And then he was the third to be recklessly leaping out the window, wind tearing the thorns off of his face as he descended to the hill and the cross and his twin and the reservoir.


	4. The Storm

IV. The Storm

The air is still and molten – burning his skin and his hair and his clothes until he isn't sure where he ends the air begins anymore. His can see red, nothing but red, no matter how wide he stretches his eyes. His arms are still searingly restrained to his sides, if they are his sides anymore. Is anything really his anymore?

Seishirou still has a hand around his neck. It feels cold – glacial – against his veins. Kamui hates to know that those fingers are growing tighter in anticipation.

His eyes are beginning to water and he is losing strength in his limbs. He hopes that it will just end soon.

So he waits – blindly, solemnly – for Seishirou to deliver death, or at least pain.

And he does.

* * *

><p>Subaru flew blindly through the air, plummeting towards the ground faster than the stairs would take him. Around and with him rain was falling, mixing with his own tears that are so much more acidic.<p>

He was slightly surprised to see that a serious storm has developed outside, with clouds nearly biting off the tops of skyscrapers and lightning devastating the concrete. He would think about it being unusual, this midday storm, if he had room left in his grief-torn mind.

_If he's dead…if Kamui's dead…I'll return here and try jumping off the top floor. See if that doesn't make a difference. _

He cratered the ground when he landed, like some foreign star descended upon desecrated ground. The wounds of the jolt healed almost immediately, and so he bounded toward the doors and the staircase to the reservoir.

From the entryway he could see that the doors had been blown away and their twisted iron frames littered the hall. A sickly orange radiance came through the doors, silhouetting a large frame in front of them.

_Fuuma._

Already his hands were claws and his eyes were angry slits. He imagined the luxurious sensation of blood dripping down his nails and arms. He almost smiled.

* * *

><p>He is pinned to something cold – something freezing, with his arms outstretched and useless. He can feel the ice of Seishirou's magic keeping him there, limp, uncomfortable and waiting.<p>

_Hands pinned, feet stinging, the sky roiling in agony above him. _

And suddenly –

_Oh God oh god oh god -_

Sharp fingers, a steel hand, tearing through his skin –

_Goddammitgod –_

Clumsily slicing through his trachea and stealing his _little singing bird _breath –

_God oh god pleasejustletitend–_

Finding one of those large veins and _squeezing _until the blood is leaving him _like skylarks when you leave the cage door open._

Kamui can vaguely feel his body trying to heel, trying to rebuild itself around the foreign hand –

_Thrashing thrashing and silently screaming because he has no voice left to speak with-_

Its _useless _because that claw still holds his vein fluttering vainly in its digits and dripping dripping dripping lifelifelife.

And Seishirou is laughing.

* * *

><p>Fuuma turned from the door to see Subaru and moved to drive him back with an almost frenzied haste.<p>

He met Subaru's claws with a long dagger no one really knew he had. The two became interlaced, the inorganic weapon locked with the organic one, faces nearly pressed together in combat.

If not for his rage Subaru would have taken satisfaction from the lack of amusement on Fuuma's face. He might have noticed the darkened wet lines on Fuuma's cheeks.

His own was wrinkled in a feral snarl.

"I'm sorry, Subaru-san. You can't go in there yet. They aren't quite finished."

_They aren't finished – he might be- he might be alive!_

Subaru slashed at him with his other hand, barely catching the side of Fuuma's head. Fuuma stumbled back a bit, free hand flying to his ribboned ear.

"I will let you pass, unharmed, when they finish. Please wait."

"NO!" Subaru yelled, voice exuding aggression. "I won't let you kill him!"

Fuuma flinched. "I'm not…" his expression grew calloused, "Stand back, Subaru. Don't force me to hurt both of you in one day."

But even as he spoke, Subaru was surging towards him with his deadly fingers outstretched.

With a gratifying rip he felt his claws tear away at the soft skin of Fuuma's exposed face.

* * *

><p>Seishirou looks down at that beautiful little face and smiles. Kamui's eyes are wide and lacquered with pain, his mouth open in a futile attempt to scream with the vocal cords that aren't there anymore. Seishirou's hand is deep in that thin neck, clutching almost desperately onto the throbbing vein and strangling away its essence.<p>

Already the boy's entire neck and chest are coated in the crimson stuff, glistening like rubies in the orange glow. The more it flows _and it hasn't slowed yet _the more the boy trembles and his skin grows cold. It smells – well, it smells like –

Seishirou hasn't fed in a while, he realizes, and looks down. It would be fitting, he figures, to feed off of this pure-bred creature. To let Subaru see what he has created.

Without removing his hand from inside the boy's neck, he leans down to the exposed collar bone and begins to lick. He is sure there is blood coating his face now - not that he cares. The warmth trickling down his tongue is well worth the mess. Pure blood – besides his _birth _with Subaru, he had not yet had the chance to feed off of it – it's so very rich and potent. It is life.

One life going straight to another, he muses. How very efficient.

* * *

><p>Subaru did not look back to see Fuuma collapse onto the floor with his bleeding face cradled in his palms. He instead raced forwards towards the scorching entryway, leaping blithely over metal scraps and debris.<p>

He stopped at the threshold. Inside all he could see was a roiling sea of gold, the water burbling and the air dripping and the red red magic infused with it being so so cold making everything so so warm.

It felt like Seishirou.

He charged in, beating back the waves of heat and looking around frantically for his twin. There – in the very center – upon water that was hardened into glass – two figures –

_NononoNoNoNoNO! Please no it can't be –_

Kamui suspended from the air, hands outstretched and held fast by dancing strands of magic, eyelids lowered and head hanging limply, blood pouring forth and dying his skin and clothes the color of the air, blood pouring forth from the _HAND_

Seishirou's hand plunged into Kamui's neck, blood pouring forth and dying his lips and teeth the color of the air, blood pouring forth and Seishirou _FEEDING_

* * *

><p>Seishirou feels the boy go limp sometime while he is feeding. He isn't sure whether the vampire is dead or not, but if not then he must be close. He stops momentarily to look at the boy's face, now hanging against his chest. His eyes are nearly closed and he has given up on trying to scream. The orange in the air makes the tears on his cheeks and the blood trickling down his chin and his almost lidded eyes glitter like topaz ornaments.<p>

Seishirou leaves his hand in the well, hoping to encourage forth more of that grotesquely fulfilling substance. Its flow has slowed considerably, but not entirely, so he lowers his head again to steal a little life –

Subaru slams into his head with as much force as he can muster. Unprepared for the assault, Seishirou's hand is torn from Kamui's throat, and he goes sliding across the magic platform he created above the reservoir, a little crimson stream trailing after him through the air and splattering around his head.

_Kill Seishirou this time I will kill him-_

_Oh God no please don't be dead I won't know what to do if you're dead. I'll die. _

_The adrenaline makes you forget the blood and the death and makes you act. _

It does not take long for Subaru to formulate a plan. Seishirou is momentarily distracted with eating Kamui, and although that disturbs Subaru greatly, it is unfortunately to his advantage. He needs to get Seishirou away long enough to touch Kamui – that is enough – and he can whisk them away to another world. The strength of it would be enough to tear Kamui from Seishirou's bonds, he is sure of that.

And with that hastily sketched plan, he smashes his body into Seishirou's unsuspecting head.

_The numbness of disbelief is what allowed Subaru to wrench those talons from that neck and send the monster flying…_

He wastes no more time with the monster. He races to Kamui, still suspended and limp, and reaches out to grab a part of him – any part of him – and manages to get a hand on his _arctic cheek. _

The runes of travel swirl around the twins and lift them into a black void. The red magic around Kamui finally dissipates and he falls into Subaru's arms as they whisk across dimensions.

_He is cold, all of him, he is hyperborean, and very still. Subaru hopes to at least hear strangled breathing but then realizes that Kamui no longer has the organs in his neck to breathe with. _

The tears start up again, this time flicking off his face and being forever suspended between the worlds. Subaru holds his little brother close and sobs into his back, choking and wailing and _hopinghopinghoping _that when they land he will be able to detect a pulse in that boreal frame lying listless across his chest.

* * *

><p><em>Thank you for reading. I would love to hear your feedback in a review!<em>

_Just to let you know, within a couple of chapters, this story will be continuing in another story of mine entitled Crimson Stars and Distant Skies. Please take a look if you are interested._

_With love, _

_Elegy_


	5. Genesis I

V. Genesis I

_Subaru's wish had been to flee. He had used the bulk of his magical ability to fly from his home world and land in the witch's dimension. He arrived – clothing torn, face bruised, eyes forlorn – right on her front yard. She had been waiting for him. _

_Tall, shapely, intimidating - she was even more worthy than the myths of his world had painted her. So he was a little surprised when, without even hearing a single frantic word he was saying, she offered him a long-fingered hand and took him inside her shop. _

_The assistant offered him dry cloths and a room to change into them. When he noticed Subaru eyeing them with confusion, he turned a bright red (heavens knows why) and gave him a quick overview on the general structure and wearing of Japanese clothing. _

_He emerged from the room, clothed in warm, bright orange. She had been waiting for him again, this time with a lazy smile hanging loosely from her lips. _

_She silently led him to another room and sat down on the floor, motioning for Subaru to do the same. After he had, she finally stated, "You have a wish."_

"_I do."_

"_I know your wish. I have seen it. Are you sure this is what you want?"_

"_I…" No. No he wasn't sure. NO. He wanted to shout and scream until she understood because he loved him he LOVED him –_

"_He will follow you."_

"_I know." He had known this since before he had changed Seishirou into a vampire, and long before this he had known the man's true intentions were far from pure. But that didn't change anything. Maybe Subaru wanted him to follow. _

"_You could have ended him. You could still end him."_

"_No. I couldn't. I can't!" _

"_So now you choose to run?"_

"_That is my wish."_

_She was silent for a minute. He couldn't meet her eyes. The assistant – the one from before, with the glasses and the odd eyes – came in with a small tray. The witch lifted a long pipe off of it and waved the boy away. He left in no small hurry._

"_This is not a wish that you can pay for alone. There will be another involved."_

"_What?" His eyes jerked up towards hers._

"_There will be another arriving soon. His wish is similar to yours. Among other things, the condition of the wish will be that you travel together. Do you understand the implications of this?"_

_Subaru thought for a long minute, fists clenched and eyebrows heavy._

"_Seishirou is only hunting for me. He would not go after a bystander."_

"_Can you really believe that after what he did to your sister?"_

_Subaru's eyes flashed gold. His hands trembled in repressed anger as he stared directly into the witch's crimson eyes. _

"_This _Other_," he stopped at hearing the roughness in his voice and took a deep inhale, "This Other," his irises returned to green and his arms stopped trembling, "is not my sister. As long as he remains uninvolved, he will be safe."_

"_How do you know that he will remain uninvolved?"_

_Subaru tilted his head, disturbingly surprised by the question. He opened his mouth to respond, although he wasn't quite sure he had one yet, when –_

"_Mistress! The other one has arrived!"_

"_Yes, he's arrived! And he isn't being very nice to Watanuki-kun!"_

_Two little girls were in the doorway now, one with short rose hair and the other with periwinkle curls. The pink haired one looked back over her shoulder and said, "Ah! Hurry Mistress! The guest is getting a little panicked!"_

"_Subaru-san. Your first task is to go subdue our guest and bring him to me." Subaru's look of confusion had yet to leave his face._

"_Subdue him…?"_

"_Quickly, before he kills my servant."_

_Subaru let the two little girls lead him (their small, warm hands wrapped around his) towards the front door. As he drew closer, he could hear the frenzied voice of this 'Watanuki-kun."_

"_Now just calm dow – AHH! I said cal –ARGH! Will you stop that already? You almost hit – CALM DOWN DAMMIT I'M NOT GOING TO HURT YOU!"_

_Subaru sprinted out the front door as soon as saw the young vampire assaulting Watanuki. The creature (no taller than himself) was swinging his claws about in a panicked fashion and bearing his fangs like a cornered animal. Watanuki was dodging the razor talons and attempting to reason with the boy – although didn't look as terrible as he should have, seeing he was being attacked by a predator – _

_Subaru realized, as he met the stranger's claws with his own, that the vampire he was fighting with was startling young. Although the boy appeared to be a teenager – with wild dark hair and a pretty porcelain face – he had probably only been changed very recently. It would explain why, in his panicked haste, he was flinging his claws around like he didn't know what to do with them. _

_Subaru was able to use the boy's age to his advantage, and it was within moments that he had the young stranger thrashing vainly beneath him, with both hands (claws now retracted) pinned above him in the dirt._

_Subaru looked down at the boy's face, even as he spoke to Watanuki._

"_Watanuki-san."_

"_Yes?"_

"_Are you hurt?"_

"_No."_

"_Good. Then please bring me something to restrain him with."_

_Subaru did not look up as Watanuki retreated into the house. Instead, he studied the face beneath him. The stranger's large eyes had faded from gold and were now a sparkling amethyst, glittering both from hue and from fear. He could not help but note that the stranger shared his own delicate facial features with his thin, straight nose and round mouth._

_The stranger was returning his gaze, although it looked as though he couldn't decide whether to be scared or defiant._

"_Let…let go of me." _

_Subaru blinked and jerked a little bit, surprised to hear words coming from the stranger's mouth. He had somehow not taken into account that the young vampire could speak._

"_L-let go of me now!" _

_The stranger's tone was a little more forceful, although his visibly trembling body belied a barely controlled fear. _

_Subaru did not know how to respond, though he had enough sense to keep one of his hands tightly around the stranger's wrists. The stranger stopped thrashing and watched him with a suspicious stare. So with no other option presenting itself, Subaru asked rather dumbly, "What is your name?"_

_The stranger narrowed his eyes in an obvious attempt to look intimidating. "Why do you want to know?" The struggling resumed. _

_Watanuki returned from the house with a long black rope in his hands. Subaru eyed it a little hopelessly._

"_I'm sorry; Watanuki-san, but that won't hold a vampire."_

"_Yuuko gave it to me."_

_Subaru looked down tiredly at the vampire struggling beneath him. His eyes had returned to gold as soon as he saw the rope. _

"_I guess it's worth a try. I'm sorry about this, Stranger-San." And with his guilt-laden preemptive apology, Subaru, with his free hand, knocked the young vampire into an unconscious stupor. Subaru tied the limp hands together tightly and stood up to face Watanuki._

"_What should I do with him now?"_

"_Bring him to Yuuko-san. It's her problem now."_

_Subaru could not help but think that there was something wrong with this Watanuki. _

* * *

><p><em>Thank you for reading thus far! I certainly hope that you are enjoying the story, and if you are not, I would love to hear about it in a review! In fact, I would love to hear any opinions - good, bad, critical - they give me motivation to write. If you do feel so inclined, please leave me one.<br>_

_With love, _

_Elegy  
><em>


	6. Genesis II

VI. Genesis II

_Subaru carried the unconscious boy inside with Watanuki, although he was much more interested in studying the vampire than in listening to Watanuki's ongoing stream of complaints. The little girls – Maru and Moro, Watanuki had called them – directed him back into the low, dark room where Yuuko was still sitting and smoking. She motioned for Subaru to sit again. _

"_What should I do with him?"_

"_Just put him down next to you. He'll be waking up soon enough."_

"_Who is he?"_

"_Your companion." Subaru flinched. After the violent display in the courtyard, he could easily think of many other people he would rather be traveling with…_

"_Where is he from?"_

"_I have no more right to disclose his past to strangers than I right have to disclose yours."_

"_But certainly we must know something of each other if we are going to be traveling across worlds together?" _

"_There are perhaps a handful of things you should know concerning him, just as there are a number of things about yourself you should share with him. Firstly, he is pureblood, like you."_

"_You're wrong." Subaru countered. Yuuko smiled lightly at him, but stayed silent. "I saw him fighting out there – he's only recently been changed. He was human."_

"_And now he is pureblood."_

"_That's not possible -."_

"_There are many things that are possible in his world that are not possible in yours." Subaru shamelessly let a look of disbelief settle on his face. _

"_Anything else?" He asked, aware that the question addressed to the dimensional witch was perhaps not the most polite._

"_He is, like you, fleeing. That is what he perceives as his true wish. But I know what his true wish is, as I know yours."_

"_I have no other wish." _

_Yuuko resumed her annoyingly light smile and let a silence settle. _

"_Who-I-what?" A foggy voice cut through the quiet. _

_Subaru looked over to his left, where the other vampire was now sitting up and growling down at the restraint around his wrists in guarded confusion. "I…" his gaze focused on Subaru. Subaru noticed a slight strain in the boy's eyes, as if they were struggling to streak gold. The boy probably didn't have the energy to personify his anger._

"_That hurt." An annoying shade of snark colored the boy's voice. It sounded a little sharp, but the boy was too disoriented to be all that dangerous. Subaru couldn't help but roll his eyes._

"_I'm sorry." And he was, a little. _

"_Finally." Yuuko said with a growing grin, "Welcome, Kamui-san. I've - we've - been waiting for you."_

_The stranger – Kamui – frowned. Then, with a start, he swung his head wildly to survey his surroundings as if looking for someone. _

"_They aren't here." Yuuko remarked with surprising sternness, "They won't be coming here." _

"_How do I know that you aren't lying?" Kamui clenched his head in perceived distress. "How do I know that you aren't one of them?"_

_The witch sighed and shook her head. "I don't really care whether or not you believe me. If it's too much for you to take in, I could always send you back-."_

"_No!"_

"_Then why don't you listen quietly like the polite boy I know that you can be, and maybe Subaru-san will even be kind enough to untie you afterwards."_

_Subaru was surprised to see Kamui look down and be quiet. _

"_Kamui-san, do you know where you are?"_

"_No."_

"_Do you know how you got here?"_

"_No."_

"_Subaru-san, would you please inform Kamui-san as to where he is?"_

"_Kamui-san…" he began, looking straight at the other boy. As he suspected, the boy's head was down, but his purple irises were fixed on Subaru with detached attention._

"_This is Yuuko-san." He motioned one hand towards the reclined woman, "We are in her shop. She is a granter of wishes."_

"_For a price." She interjected._

"_For a price." Subaru resumed, "If you are here, then you probably have a wish that she intends to grant."_

"_Thank you, Subaru-san. Does that make sense, Kamui-san?" _

_Kamui nodded. _

"_Do you have a wish, Kamui-san?"_

"_I…," he began, and finally lifted his head to look at Yuuko, "You said they aren't here?"_

"_They are not."_

"_I don't think that you can – they said it was impossible – can you change me back?"_

"_I'm sorry. There are very few things that I cannot do, but your change was permanent."_

"_Then my wish is that they never find me again."_

"_That wish is perhaps more expensive than you imagine."_

"_No." Subaru noted that the boy's body was beginning to tremble._

"_They will pursue you."_

"_Still, I – no. No, no, no. Anything. I will pay anything! I never imagined that I would escape them. No…I…anything. I have nothing more precious than my freedom from them. You can take anything." As Kamui shook, his eyes were fixed on the witch, and glazed with unshed tears. _

_Subaru had quietly scooted closer to the boy and extended a finger to cut his binds. Kamui gave no indication of noticing that the ropes had fallen from his wrists. _

"_Then you and Subaru-san shall pay the price for your wishes together. I will give you the means to flee, but you must always remain together. That is the price. And for this you shall be twins."_

_Subaru and Kamui were looking at each other._

"_Do you accept?"_

Subaru held Kamui's body tight to his chest as they were flung in between worlds. He sobbed into that dark, blood-drenched hair, regretting and regretting and regretting because it didn't have to be this way and he knew it. He had had a choice to avert this, long ago, and he didn't.

* * *

><p>Thank you for reading! I would greatly appreciate a review.<p> 


	7. Duality

VII. Duality

They landed somewhere dark and hard, in a jumble of limbs and something stickier. Subaru could not suppress a sob as he fumbled for Kamui's head, unable to see it through the black.

"Oh, god. Oh!" He had both hands clasped on either side of the unmoving head. "God no. Kamui!" He shook it a little, hoping _dyeingpleading _to get anything - a nod, a groan, a slight flutter of his eyelashes – _he just needed for Kamui to be alive. _

His nocturnal eyes had adjusted enough for him to make out the pale body beneath him, with the twisted limbs and weeping neck and static chest.

"Kamui," he pleaded again, this time a little louder. Kamui's face was growing colder. "Kamui!" Subaru's voice was laced with desperation as he frantically tried to come up with anything _ANYTHING _to get the boy to breathe.

He pulled Kamui's head up to his chest, cradling it as he bawled, "Oh god no. Kamui. Please no." And he let his magic – his very meager amount of magic, in reality – seep into the glacial figure in his arms.

When there was no response, Subaru began to tremble. "Kamui. Kamui! No!" Subaru let his voice rise in grief. The body wilted against his own confirmed his darkest fears. He shook until he was exhausted, all the while holding onto Kamui's lifeless form.

Slowly he lowered Kamui back onto the ground, his tears following and landing on ashen skin. He wished, during their time together, he had told Kamui how beautiful he had been. How even now, after Fate had snatched everything away, the grey light made his skin look like marble. He ran a hand through Kamui's thick hair, as gently as if he were sleeping instead of –

"Who's there?" A thin voice called out through the dark.

Subaru wondered how efficiently he could commit suicide in this new world. Perhaps this stranger could assist him. _Who knows, _he thought bitterly, _this stranger might even do it for me. _

Subaru heard a clicking sound, and then the room was washed with harsh white light. But instead of focusing on the stranger or even his surroundings, Subaru looked back down at Kamui's still body, hoping the light would reveal some hope, some miracle-

It revealed a hole where Kamui's neck used to be and a distinct lack of healing. Subaru felt another battalion of tears rowing across his eyes and allowed them passage onto his face. Grief overcame him again and he collapsed onto the ground at Kamui's side.

"Subaru?"

Subaru looked up, barely aware enough to realize that a stranger in another world should not know his name. With a start, his eyes grew wide.

"H-Hokuto?"

But it couldn't be Hokuto. It couldn't be _his _Hokuto, anyway. He had seen _that_ one impaled on Seishirou's arm, hanging from him like a delicate ornament, smiling and dying at the same time. Besides, this Hokuto was a little older, and he knew that his twin would never allow such plain, dark clothing on her frame.

All the same, the girl looked like Hokuto. The girl looked like him.

"Subaru?"

"No – I'm not your– I'm sorry. I…I…" _I'm alone._ He let his head fall back onto Kamui's chest.

"What is going on in here?" Subaru heard the low voice from the doorway and jerked around to greet it. His faced flushed and his nails grew long. Yes – finally, he knew what he had to do. Perhaps Fate finally pitied him and was allowing him a sliver of pleasure before he took his life.

_He_ was in the doorway behind _this _Hokuto, with one hand resting on her shoulder. Subaru did not care that he would have to rip through the woman to get to _him,_ no, he would push past her and sink his talons into _his _neck and watch as the life drained from his face.

But _his _eyes were not focused on Subaru, no, they were looking past and down onto the heap of ivory and crimson at Subaru's feet. "7D-H?" _he _said, eyes fixed on Kamui. _He _looked up at Subaru with disgust etched into _his_ brow, "Did you feed from 7D-H?"

Subaru launched himself at _him, _tackling _him_ to the ground in the doorway. "How. Dare. You." he managed in between rage-laden breaths, "You monster. I should have let you die back then!"

Seishirou looked up at him, confusion evident on his features. "I don't," he began slowly in that calm voice that Subaru had recently come to despise, "think I am who you think I am."

It took very little time for Subaru to realize that _this _Seishirou was definitely not the same. This one was perhaps a little friendlier looking, with small wrinkles around his eyes and glasses with cracked lenses. But the smile was the same. Oh, the smile. Subaru did not care that this was a different Seishirou. The flesh between his fingers would feel the same –

Subaru found himself displaced from Seishirou with a great shove from the latter. _This _Seishirou strode across the room and to the heap that once was Kamui.

"Hokuto." Seishirou's voice assumed an urgency that Subaru had never heard from the other, "It's 7D-H. I need you to go into the study – in the top drawer of the second file cabinet – and get me the syringe labeled 63-2-J. Quickly." Hokuto nodded tersely and left the room.

Seishirou reached down a hand to brush Kamui's neck. Subaru felt rage rise once again from his tear-weary heart and flew _faster than the bastard could see_ to stop Seishirou from touching him.

"Don't touch him." Subaru's fingers were tight around Seishirou's wrist.

"Why?" this Seishirou snapped. "So you can finish feeding on him? You've done enough, vampire."

Subaru growled low and feral, "I fed on him? How dare you-."

"Do you know how long he took to make, vampire? And then he disappears – a three million dollar investment, disappearing – and now he returns with a vampire biting out his neck. He's no use dead."

Subaru howled, high and broken. Tears broke the plane of his face again as he threw his head back. "You killed him." A choked sob. "He's dead and I'm alone and you KILLED HIM!"

Seishirou roughly grabbed him by the collar. "I don't know whether you speak the truth, vampire, but I know that if you even want the hope of seeing him awake again, you will listen to every word I tell you."

Subaru stopped wailing and looked at Seishirou with the tiniest expression of hope.

"How long has he been like this?"

"Like what?"

"Like not breathing."

"I-um-." _Eternity_. "Ten minutes."

Hokuto jogged back into the room with an uncovered syringe in hand. She knelt down next to Seishirou and handed him the needle. This time, her eyes did not stray to Subaru, but instead remained fixed on the blood staining Kamui's shirt.

Seishirou hastily jabbed the needle into Kamui's thin forearm, pushing the entire fluid out in a matter of seconds. "Pour your magic into him," he said to Subaru, although his eyes did not stray from Kamui's neck."

"I already have."

"Do it until you lose consciousness."

Subaru once again crawled on top of his twin and lowered his hands to the cold cold chest. He released all the magic he could, everything, the heat in his body, every particle and fiber of energy, and he hoped his love went too.

Subaru's head began to spin when he heard Hokuto gasp and Seishirou inhale. He looked up from his hands to see that the muscle and flesh in the exposed neck was struggling to form, to at least rebuild a trachea –

"Don't stop." Seishirou ordered roughly. He had elevated Kamui's head in one hand and was watching the healing with intensity. "He's not breathing yet."

With a fascinated horror, Subaru watched as the neck partially reconstructed, still void of skin and wind pipe still holey, although those holes were closing quickly-

Kamui's chest rose with a great heave as his starved lungs demanded air. Seishirou barely concealed his surprise, and then barked, "Hokuto. Bandages and type-A blood bags. Now!"

Subaru flew back, barely able to see due to lack of magic. But he had _felt _Kamui breath. His Kamui. He was alive. Subaru raced to his side, looking down at the now perspiring face.

As soon as Kamui opened his eyes, tears splattered down his cheeks as if delivered by some great hurricane. He opened his mouth to scream although he was not able to produce sound with his patchwork neck. His arms began to convulse.

Seishirou grabbed one thin arm. "Conscious?" He said in concerned amazement. He reached around Kamui to hold both flailing wrists to the ground. "Hokuto!" He hollered. "Morphine as well!"

"He needs blood, vampire. If you want him to survive."

Subaru slit open his wrist with a sharp fingernail. He held Kamui's chin still with one hand and forced his gushing wrist into the boy's mouth. He wasn't concerned about the wound staying open, as Kamui had instinctively bit down _hard _on his wrist in the throes of agony.

Hokuto returned for the second time, holding a wad of bandages, another syringe and two bags of vermillion liquid. "Hold this arm down." Seishirou instructed, and then released one of Kamui's wrists to take the new syringe. He used its contents as quickly as the first.

Kamui's neck was still open, still bleeding, but (as far as Subaru could tell) the major veins and organs had seemingly reconstructed enough to function. "Stop feeding him. Hold down both arms so I can wrap his neck."

Subaru held onto both of Kamui's hands, although he had stopped thrashing and was instead shaking like a new tree against the wind. He sighed softly and put his face close to Kamui's ear, quietly saying, "I'm so sorry, so sorry. Please endure it. It will be over soon, I promise. Don't leave me, Kamui. Please don't leave me."

Seishirou wound the white bandages tightly around the boy's neck, directly onto the healing, wet flesh. The gauze was quickly darkened, but Seishirou continued to wrap it and secured it with a pin. Although Kamui was still lightly shaking, he did not have the energy to dangerously flail, so Subaru let loose both his hands and instead put his hands around the boy's cheeks.

"Don't leave me, Kamui. Brother. I'm – I'm so sorry."

Kamui blinked, still unable to speak and too weak to nod. Subaru accepted that as acknowledgement and resorted to stroking the boy's forehead.

"You are his brother?"

Subaru looked up at Seishirou, who had risen to his feet and had an arm around a stricken looking Hokuto.

"His twin."

"You're lying."

"There are many things," he said, bitter nostalgia animating his voice, "that are possible in our world that are not possible in yours."

"No." Seishirou said, kneeling down next to the two. "You don't understand. I -."

He paused, seeing that both Subaru and Kamui had fallen unconscious, Kamui from the pain and strains of healing, Subaru from both blood and energy loss. Seishirou stood again, looking at Hokuto, and sighed. "I'm not sure about 7D-H, but I think that they'll both live. I'll stay up to give 7D-H hourly transfusions. Can you move the vampire up to a bed?"

"Yeah," Hokuto said a little warily. "What about when he wakes up?"

Seishirou sighed heavily. "When he wakes up, there will be a lot to explain."

"For him to explain, or us?"

"Both."

* * *

><p>I was perhaps feeling a little sentimental when I wrote this chapter. Please let me know what you think in a review!<p> 


	8. Exodus

VIII. Exodus

_Neither Kamui nor Subaru thought that the price of their wishes was incredibly steep. Yuuko had explained, with a lazy wave of her hand, that they were to remain with each other at all times, as they would be unable to travel otherwise. "Like twins!" She had exclaimed, almost too excited at the prospect. _

"_But of course, there is one other thing." Her smile remained, but her eyes did not belie amusement. _

"_Your time. The other price is your time."_

"_What?" Kamui asked a little snobbily. Subaru was a little surprised when Yuuko did not respond to scold him._

"_The flow of your time will change. It will nearly freeze."_

"_What does that mean?" Subaru asked, almost as snobbily as Kamui would have. _

"_That question will answer itself eventually, Subaru-san, much better than I can. Stop making that face, Kamui-kun. It's unbecoming on a young man such as yourself to look _that _grumpy all the time." _

_Kamui shifted uncomfortably, as though he was suddenly reminded of his odd circumstances. Subaru scooted away from him a bit and looked at Yuuko. _

"_How soon can we leave?"_

_Yuuko wagged a long finger through the air and sang, "We're a little impatient, aren't we? As soon as we can get that child over there in decent clothing, you two twinny-poos can set off~!"_

"_What did you call us?" Subaru asked in amazed confusion. Kamui threw his hands up in indignation and exclaimed, "I'm not a child!"_

"_Oh!" Yuuko set down her pipe and rolled her eyes slowly, "how I _wish_ you could stay here, Kamui-kun! You're even funnier than Watanuki ~."_

…

_Yuuko had specifically instructed that they make skin contact in order to travel. She had unambiguously outlined that simple parameter as the only necessity for their world-hopping. Subaru felt that, given the circumstances, this request was not an entirely outrageous one. And yet, as she explained it, he heard Kamui hiss in disapproval. He made sure to turn an offended eye to the young vampire, and then to maintain it as they prepared for their departure. _

_After Watanuki had forced Kamui into some half-decent clothing, the newly christened twins were impetuously pushed into the shop's front yard. Yuuko stood in the doorway, watching to two expectantly. Subaru turned to Kamui and found him staring at the ground with his arms at his sides and his shoulders tensed. Subaru once again found himself questioning whether his wish was worth traveling with the boy. _

"_Well," he said, though Kamui gave no indication of hearing him, "we should probably go."_

"_Yeah." Kamui responded quietly, although he continued scrutinizing the grass beneath him. _

"_Are you ready?" Subaru asked as he started edging closer._

"_Yeah." Kamui looked up at him and nodded a little. Subaru set a gentle palm on his shoulder. The boy started a little beneath his hand, but didn't let his eyes stray from Subaru's face. He continued staring, even as tendrils of magic raced around them and swept them into the nether-dimension._

_This was precisely the second time that Subaru had traveled across worlds. The first time, he had blindly flung the majority of his magical power in a general direction and luckily had enough sense to land at Yuuko's shop. He supposed he had not been in the best state to assess the actual experience, because he certainly didn't remember it being so violent._

_Waves and tides of energy whipped around the twins and tore at their clothing as the two were swept into the currents of the cosmos. Almost immediately after they began, Subaru's grip on Kamui's shoulder became painfully strong. He did not know what would happen if they were separated during travel, but he could not imagine it ending quite well. Kamui seemed about as prepared as Subaru was for the rough flight, and soon found himself clutching at the other boy's shirt in nervousness._

_They landed with a distinct and painful thud onto something hard and unforgiving. Moments like these made Subaru fully appreciate his regenerative abilities – before he even opened his eyes to view the new world, he felt his freshly cracked ribs and newly purpling bruises healing themselves to nonexistence. _

_He opened his eyes to find himself in uncomfortable proximity with Kamui. The boy had landed strait on top of him, and even as Subaru made to mention this, Kamui realized with a start and jumped off and away from him with an undignified yelp. Though he was a little offended with his response, Subaru chose to ignore him and instead examine his surroundings. _

_It seemed that the two had made a small crater upon impacting the new world's surface. Luckily, both he and Kamui were still nestled in the center, protected from whatever was outside its edges. _

_The ground was foreign to Subaru; it looked black, uniform and fairly smooth, save the large cracks and dents he and his twin had made. Around him he could hear a loud hum, and the blaring of some sort of instrument, but without better vantage he could not see the origin of the noise. Before advancing to the raised edges of the crater, he glanced over at Kamui and asked, "Do you know where we are?"_

_Kamui, who had previously been examining the ground with fascination written upon his features, sullenly shook his head. He looked up to Subaru and watched as the older vampire approached to edge. _

_Subaru immediately retreated from the edge of the crater after catching the briefest glimpse of the outside world._

"_Kamui-kun!" He yelled, seeing the other prepare to climb up the edge, "Don't go up there!"_

_Subaru could see the boy struggle with the logical reasoning to listen to Subaru's advice and the desire to respond like a brat. Luckily, sense won this round and Kamui settle with asking, "What was up there?"_

"_Hundreds of them…large…well, monsters, I guess, coming straight at me really loudly and really quickly."_

_Kamui thought for a moment, and then said, "But they haven't come down here."_

"…_no."_

"_I'm going to look."_

"_Kamui-kun, I wouldn't-." Subaru stopped, because Kamui was already scaling the wrinkled edge of the crater. _

_Kamui rose his head above the ground and – _

_Hundreds and hundreds of loud, unidentifiable _things _coming straight at him, roaring loudly and seemingly changing direction away from him last minute. They were huge and brightly colored; they felt warm and smelt like fire. _

_Subaru felt a smidge of satisfaction when Kamui tumbled back down to his side, his little face white and surprised. _

"_What are those things?" Kamui asked breathily._

"_Our bigger concern is how to get away from here safely."_

"_And how do you suggest that?" Kamui's voice was beginning to strain with concealed panic. _

"_We should probably wait. We can recuperate our strength down here and try to figure _something_ out."_

_Kamui looked at him for a lazy moment, and then rose back to his feet. "I don't like waiting." _

_The plan was clear enough in his words, Subaru surmised that Kamui intended on _attacking _the monsters. Part of him – a part so injured it was nearly gone anyway – found that youthful recklessness charming. However centuries of experience made him more keen on smacking that pretty face free of its abrasiveness instead of reveling in it. _

_Before Subaru could react to Kamui, and thankfully before Kamui could do something idiotic, a voice carried down to them from above the crater wall:_

"_Hey, you two made it! How's it going?"_

_Subaru looked up. With dizzying speed, Kamui flashed in front of the stranger, with one long finger held up to his neck._

"_Who sent you?" Kamui asked in a tone like ice. _

"_Hey, hey – slow down buddy!" Subaru noted a mess of dark hair and friendly, heavy eyes. Perhaps, he though, his travelling companion was overacting a bit. _

_But then the stranger was reaching out and grabbing Kamui's wrist and pushing it away with no apparent effort and Subaru though that perhaps he himself was underacting a bit. _

_And then Subaru was next to Kamui, staring this dangerous newcomer straight in the face and making clear through his stiff back, squared shoulders and elongated fingernails that _he _was the more dangerous of the two._

_The stranger's unhurried response was to extend a hand and say, through a toothy grin,"Arisugawa Sorata, at your service." _

* * *

><p><em>I apologize for my long absence. I am pleased to present you with this lately installment of That Which Cannot Heal. I do hope that you enjoy it, and please let me know what you think in a review.<br>_

_Love always,  
><em>

_Elegy  
><em>


	9. A Lack Thereof

_IX. A Lack Thereof_

_This 'Sorata' character seemed entirely unperturbed by both Subaru's threatening body language and the blatantly ignored handshake. He also seemed unconcerned about the loud, colorful monsters whizzing by him at dizzying speeds. _

_Subaru sighed loudly and tried to ignore the notion that his decades of honing the perfect predatory intimidation technique had just been nullified by…basically… a child. _

_Kamui, on the other hand, felt it appropriate to growl lowly and tightly tense his shoulders. Seeing this, Sorata only grinned wider and patted Kamui on the back heavily, saying, "Haha – I like this guy!"_

_Already sensing Kamui's incoming anger, Subaru allowed his nails to retract and put his hands on Kamui's shoulders – making sure to push down with a little authoritative force. Sorata continued his quaking chuckle as Kamui turned around to snarl at his new brother, though he was incapable of much else._

"_Yuuko said you guys would be coming soon," Sorata continued, with one hand scratching his head and the other perched lazily on his hip, "but she didn't say where. I can't believe you landed in the middle of an interstate!" Subaru didn't understand the concept of landing in an 'interstate', but he was relieved to hear the stranger was connected with Yuuko. He felt Kamui's shoulders sink a bit beneath his hands, though the boy's face did little to communicate his comfort. _

_But centuries of being a predator did not allow Subaru such things as trust and faith. His ease was somewhat curtailed by his skepticism, and he kept his eyes narrowed as he waited for Sorata to somehow qualify himself. _

_Sorata must be at ease with _them, _Subaru realized, because he turned his back to the twins to survey what was behind them. Sorata seemed perfectly content being surrounding by a fast-moving herd of colorful animals. Indeed, it seemed that he had somehow tamed one of them; he was staring at a large red one standing perfectly still only a few short feet from him. _

_An appendage on the side of the animal moved out (a wing, perhaps? Subaru thought) and both of the twins were surprised as a person emerged from what appeared to be the innards of the monster. _

"_Arashi!" Sorata called, still smiling and now waving, "I found them!" _

_Subaru immediately felt – as the graceful woman approached them – the gravity of her magical ability twisting tendrils of loose magic about her. He squinted and could see, with much effort, swirling red loops dancing about her shoulders and head. The weight of her power felt unyielding and refreshingly pure. _

_Of course, the arrival of a sorcerer could be either very (very) informative or quite troublesome. Her magic gave Subaru a gate into her qualities and intentions – empathy was his best magic suit, after all – but if he found that her intentions were sinister, he and his…brother…would be at a steep disadvantage. Subaru's own magic had been blasted away by his first inter-world journey, and though it was slowly starting to re-accumulate, he hardly believed that it would be enough to protect him and the child now in his care. _

_And even with his magical powers at their height, he had found malevolent sorcerers to be quite immovable (_each last breath a hurricane each last shudder an earthquake each last drop_ drop drop _a monsoon and thin limbs convulsing - that face so much like his – _if only it were his – _lips pulled back in a familiar smile even as her heart trembled and ended its rhythm)

_It stings as Subaru allows a green thread of his own strained magic to take form. He conceals a grimace as he allows it to extend towards the now-still sorcerer. To his surprise, she sends a thread of her own to meet his, and with a gentle nudge signaled only by a slight incline of her chin, encourages it to wrap loosely around his. _

_He slowly takes in everything – pleased to find that the sorcerer has not kept anything reserved from him. He immediately senses a traditional pride in the girl, not a self-important pride, but a respect for self and tradition. He sifts a little and discovers a little warmth, quite a bit of deeply buried love, and an overwhelming sadness that dulls her whole being. He detects no malignancy, and lastly is able to feel that she, too, has some abilities with empathy. _

_It would only be polite, of course, to allow her the same information that she allowed him. He nods and she gently begins to search him. Her mental touches are surprisingly light and Subaru feels none of the pangs usually associated with such violation. He feels her stumble across his own pride, his wounded love…his sadness, so like hers and yet still distant. _

_Arashi shifted subtly and their magic drifted apart. She made no other indication that she and a stranger had just bared their souls to each other. _

_Subaru turned his attention back to Kamui, who was still tense and irritable beneath his hands. It seemed he had not noticed Subaru's and Arashi's interactions at all; he was much too busy looking frustratingly irritated at Sorata's incessant babble-_

"_-and then Arashi was like, 'come look at the TV!' And all the news stations were going crazy, thinking someone had bombed the interstate. So we got in the car fast as we could, cause we had a feeling you guys would make some sorta grand entrance-."_

"_We should go before the authorities get here." Arashi's voice was low and unemotional, revealing no stress beyond that of perhaps slight irritation. _

_Sorata immediately halted his sentence and put an arm around Arashi. "Gentlemen," he proclaimed loudly, "this is my beautiful, loving wife, Kishuu Arashi-."He was once again cut off by a great shove from the aforementioned. Subaru could swear he felt the tremor of a snicker come from Kamui._

"_Haha – we can finish this conversation in the car. Let's go, we'll take you to your new place!" While Subaru didn't understand the majority of that sentence, he gathered from Sorata's extended hand that he was meant to get in the large, red thing from whence Arashi came. He supposed that if the other sorcerer was comfortable getting in it, whatever it was, he would be too. _

_Of course – _of course – _as he moved to get in this 'car', he heard Kamui start in dissatisfaction behind him. _

"_You want me to get inside that _thing?"

"_Hey – it's not that old!"_

"_Yes it is." Arashi interjected._

"_And don't worry. The drive is short!"_

"_Kamui-kun," Subaru said, turning back around to face him, "I am sure that we are safe in Sorata-san's and Arashi-san's care."_

"_Oh, you too?" Kamui cried, throwing his hands up in the air in exaggerated frustration, "And how are you so sure?"_

"_Kamui-kun." Subaru's voice was dripping with menace. As expected, the boy didn't react to his tone, and stood almost expectantly with his arms propped on his hips. _

"_Yes, Subaru-_san?" _Kamui replied, almost mockingly._

_Subaru slowly picked his way back to Kamui, coming so close he could feel his companion's breath across his face. Other than a slight widening of eyes, Kamui offered no reaction – no hissing, no jolting, no shameful yelping – this was a challenge. _

_Slowly, Subaru lifted a hand and settled it in the youth's ungovernable hair. He tangled his fingers in the strands, still searching the face in front of him for a reaction. Receiving none, he clenched his hand tightly and dug his fingers into Kamui's scalp. _

_From a distance, Sorata's distance, it probably appeared that he was petting his brother's head. _

_With an acute wrench, he pulled the boy's ear close to his mouth. Kamui's hand flew up and clenched around the offending wrist, but Subaru did nothing but twist his hair harder. _

_In a voice so quiet only an augmented ear could hear, he began to whisper, _

"_I was under the impression, Kamui-kun, that we must always be together," he tugged a little harder, _

"_and I think, in situations like these," _

_harder,_

"_it would be best for _you_,"_

_harder, _

"_to do," _

_HARDER, _

"_What."_

_DIGGING HIS FINGERS IN- _

"_I." _

_TWIST HEAR A WINCE- _

"_Say." _

_He lets go of the boy's head only to ensnare his wrist instead. Before waiting for a reply – because he really, really isn't in a state of mind to wisely handle one – he marches back over to Sorata and Arashi, with Kamui stumbling behind him almost obediently._

_He isn't sure whether it's pride or shock that keeps Kamui silent. He doesn't really care. _

* * *

><p><em>Apparently it isn't an animal. According to Sorata, it's a device used for transportation at more convenient speeds. Also according to Sorata, it was made by humans. Subaru can't really believe him.<em>

_But soon he and Kamui are seated in the back of it, faces up to the widows, and he guesses he has to believe him because the thing can go faster than he can. _

_While the sights outside of the windows are foreign, they are hardly interesting. The journey seems to drag on and Subaru simply can't keep his gaze directed outwards. He lets his eyes slowly drift to his twin, who has made hardly a sound since their previous chat. Kamui sits with his shoulders slumped and arms crossed defensively against his chest. His lips are slightly crinkled into what Subaru gathers to be a repressed pout. _

_Sorata and Arashi remain quiet throughout the trip. Arashi, Subaru knows, can sense the unspoken acrimony between the twins, but he can't imagine her being more talkative had the situation been otherwise. Sorata seems content to smile and operate the 'car' and stare at Arashi when the vehicle-thing isn't moving. _

_It is no small relief when the vehicle stops for the final time and Sorata says (in a voice amplified by the prolonged silence) "We're here! We're at your place!"_

'_Their place' can't quite compare to the grandeur of his old home in his old world (towering stone spires and arcing windows breaking the light) but it certainly isn't terrible. _

"_The neighborhood's real nice-." They all exit the vehicle, "-pretty quiet, too-" They walk towards the door together, with the exception of Arashi "and you just let us know if you need anything-" Sorata is feeling about for something in one of his many pockets, "-number on the fridge next to the magnet with the fish-" produces two shiny silver keys, "-grocery store down the street on your second left-" and plops them into Subaru's hand. "Well there you go! I'll come and check up on you guys in a week or so. Good luck settling in!"_

_Sorata doesn't wait for a response. He waves as he walks back to the car and drives away before Subaru has even begun to decipher the sentence he was just subjugated to. _

_He turns back to the house and Kamui with his forlorn eyes and tired mouth. The apprehension hanging from his features almost makes Subaru regret losing his temper earlier. _

_Subaru finds that the lock turns easily and opens the door with a shove. He steps over the threshold safely (not expecting otherwise, of course) and says softly, "Come on, Kamui-kun." The boy follows, pulling the door shut behind him. _

_They tread through a dim hallway (with rooms stemming off like little leaves on a plant) and into a larger room filled with strange, unidentifiable appliances and more identifiable furniture. _

_They simply stand for a moment, both too exhausted and tiny against the face of an unidentifiable future to do much else. _

"_So." Kamui is the first to speak, "What do we…do?"_

_The question is vague, but Subaru understands the essence of it. What _do _they do, in this strange world, with more freedom than either had ever before known? What do they do, now that their only family consisted of the other, their knowledge of each other limited to one day's interactions? What do they do, when both were so scared and small and young and old?_

_Kamui faces his back towards him. Were it not for a small tremor running up the his spine, Subaru would not have known the boy was silently sobbing._

_Subaru wished he could claim that it was out of respect for the other boy's pride that he simply turned away. He wished that it was ignorance that caused him to turn around, and not his aching need to stifle his own tears with the bottoms of his palms. _

* * *

><p><em>Thank you for your readership! Please feel free to leave responses and criticism in a review. I appreciate any feedback I can get!<br>_

_Yours Always,  
><em>

_Elegy  
><em>


	10. These Frigid Places

X. These Frigid Places

Subaru's return to consciousness is incredibly slow. It begins with the simple realization that he _is._

After his existence has been established, he begins to reason that he might have some physical form to house said existence. He can't particularly remember what this form is, though the recognition of its being is enough to invoke sensation.

The implications of sensation quickly become unfortunate. There is a stinging emptiness everywhere, like the boundaries of his form are threatening to cave because they are so unfilled. It is a trembling, incessant ache that pulls back in with threatening force.

He tentatively expands his cognizance, trying to map out the nature and boundaries of his own essence. Slowly, as he begins to discover himself, the pains yield and he is able to recall his own bones, muscles and flesh. Thus, with his own presence determined, he follows a logical progression and ponders upon that outside himself.

There is a world – he is remembering a little more clearly now – no, there are many worlds –

There is Kamui.

His memories and his consciousness finally unite and he sits up with a panicked jerk. His limbs feel heavy and bruised at his sides, but he is otherwise unhindered as he swings his legs to the side of the bed and examines the room with a cautious gaze.

The room is dim and windowless. He's seated upon a fairly standard sized bed with rough, uniform blankets and a synthetic pillow. To his left is a small bedside table, upon which he reckons is a lamp. It looks nothing like any lamp or lantern he has ever seen before, but his experiences in other technologically advanced worlds have taught him that there isn't much else it could be.

Across the small room is another bed very different from his. It is raised up higher on little, wobbly legs with wheels. The edges of the frame are lined with metal guards tall enough to prevent – he hopes – someone from rolling out of it. It is surrounded with various unidentifiable machines and little clear bags hanging from poles (_what did they call those in the other worlds? IDs…no, IVs?)_

He can feel his twin's weak essence pulsing from the sterilized confines of the other bed.

He stands up, suddenly very anxious to see his brother's face. His whole body throbs and screams for magic that will make it less heavy, almost pushing him to sit down again. The air is dry and starved, though, so he forces himself to cross the room despite his shaky joints.

He reaches the bedside after five extensive steps and grabs the guard with desperate fingers. The exertion has momentarily cost him his vision and he waits in agony for the pounding in his head to fade. Finally, finally it does and he is able to see Kamui –_ his _Kamui – nearly buried amongst the paper white sheets.

For a childish, long moment Subaru's heart halts. He is clearly able to feel Kamui's living soul, though it is faint.

It is very faint.

But despite this he is unable to think of anything – feel anything – besides that icy, creeping fear (_Oh my god he isn't breathing he isn't moving blood blood -) _when he sees his little brother, arranged in the bed almost like he was thrown there, face and neck dressed in that horrible browning war paint and body very very still.

His throat seizes and suddenly he needs physical assurance that Kamui really is alive and his memories from the night previous aren't simply fantasies of a desperate mind.

He lays a trembling hand on Kamui's inert chest and is relieved - _the crushing teeth of guilt have begun to loosen from around his heart – _when he is able to feel the smallest hint of warmth.

With that monumental discovery, he is in a more agreeable state to further assess the situation.

Kamui is still clothed in the torn and stained garments from acid Tokyo, though they have begun to resemble tattered pillowcases more than actual clothing. His arms are sprawling and unmoving, and his legs are tangled in the sheets. His pendant has been removed (and thankfully, Subaru notices, been placed on his bedside table next to the alien lamp) and his neck is wrapped very tightly and thickly with bandages that are no longer colorless.

The uncomfortably crisp sheets look like blocks of ice pressed up against Kamui's skin, with the similarly stiff pillow beneath his head keeping him barely afloat. Subaru doesn't want him to wake up in the ice water alone so he gently climbs atop the shrunken glaciers and settles lightly at Kamui's side.

Very, very gingerly he tucks his twin's head beneath his chin.

He is almost asleep when he hears soft voices outside the door.

"What are we going to do with him?"

"Keep him in a coma for at least a week. After that, bring him back slowly."

"You know that isn't what I meant!" He hears a sigh.

"I don't know yet."

"You can't honestly think that we can keep him hidden here? They'll find him within the week. And what will happen to us then?"

"I don't think they will, Hokuto. He's undetectable."

"And what about the other one?"

"He has a name."

"He _isn't _Subaru."

"He isn't _your _Subaru, Hokuto. And I don't think he is detectable, either, though I will confirm that when he wakes up."

"You can't be serious." Hokuto's voice begins to rise. "I can't believe you! You don't actually trust him, do you? And here I thought-." She is cut off by a harsh shush. Subaru hears footsteps and realizes that they have moved away from the door.

"A week, brother?" He whispers into Kamui's ear. He imagines Kamui crossing his arms over his chest and wrinkling his brow as he asks with a cross huff, "_A whole week?"_ But of course only silence greets him and it hurts deep in-between his ribs.

He considers for a moment fleeing with Kamui onto the next world. He wishes he could at least mentally connect with his twin, to hear the usual excuses, "_it's not very pretty here," _or, _"I don't like our company much," _or even_, "the food is icky here,"_ that would convince him to grab hold of his brother and let fate fling them into other brighter worlds.

But the idea almost immediately seems unfeasible, and even though their current situation is rife with uncertainty, at least it guarantees continued medical care. Subaru accepts, with a growing, simmering discontent, that he is going to be alone and amongst strangers for at least seven days.

And Kamui will be sleeping in frigid white waters.

Very, very carefully he settles a hand in Kamui's hair. He tangles his fingers in the strands, searching Kamui's face for a reaction that he know won't come. He begins to stroke the hair delicately, brushing his fingers against the tender skin of his sibling's forehead.

He is overwhelmed with a sense of smallness in the face of vast and unreadable fates. He hopes that the meager weight of he and Kamui together – a unit that he now acknowledges – will be enough to keep them from drowning in the swirling torrents of heartache and fear.

"What do we do, Kamui?" He whispers again, knowing that neither he nor the pain-streaked dreams of his twin will have answers, "What do we do?"

* * *

><p><em>Hello, dear readers. I hope you enjoyed this next chapter. I wanted to take at least a short break from all the drama and angst, although I'm not sure I'm any good at ever taking a break from the angst. <em>

_Please let me know what you think in a review! I welcome any feedback - it makes me a better writer.  
><em>

_Ever yours,  
><em>

_Elegy  
><em>


	11. In Full Bloom

XI. In Full Bloom

_After Kamui felt the tears stinging his cheeks, he hastily made way down the hallway again, hopefully under the pretense of finding a room to rest in. He didn't hear Subaru make any move to stop him and he hoped that his new companion hadn't noticed the shaking that was assaulting his limbs. _

_Very quickly he found a small room with an odd looking bed and other less identifiable furniture. He closed the door with a little slam and collapsed upon the bed (it was surprisingly much more comfortable than the ones he was used to). He then allowed the torrents of hopelessness to shake him fully, and even allowed a small sound or two to escape between the hands clasped feebly around his face. _

_The tantrum passed swiftly, though – as he began to examine his situation with reason. He was no longer alone, though the thought of his traveling companion brought a sour expression to his face. From what he could fathom, he was in a relatively safe environment, which he supposed (though he had little experience to judge from) that it was more than he could say about his home world. Everything was different. But, from what he could gather, everything was a little better. _

_A mirror glinted at him across the wall._

_He realized he hadn't seen himself properly since he – since it – _

_Since everything became vastly different. _

_He stood up, fighting back the fear simmering deep in his chest like hot coals. He strode across the room, at first training his eyes on the ground below. He stopped directly in front of the mirror, still unable to break his eyes away from his feet. His eyes slowly began to drift up, scanning the baseboards, the yellow wall, seeing the white trim and the beginning of the glass._

_He remembered the last time he saw his reflection-_

He could see his own face above him, twice reflected in the large glasses that shielded apathetic eyes staring down at him. His own eyes are wider than they feel, and he had not noticed until now that his chest was heaving with such sporadic vigor. The glasses withdraw from his vision and he is left blinded by a great, white light directly above him.

He strains to move an arm to cover his face, to block the beacon above him, but is unable to lift a single limb from the table he lay supine on.

The glasses hover above him again, momentarily relieving him of his blindness. He decides very quickly, however, that he would prefer the stinging blaze of the overhead lamp to the lifeless panes and surgical mask situated directly below them, making the human towering above him look more like a fissure in the white room than a living, sentient unit.

He then notices a continued hiss and rumble seemingly surrounding him. He wonders why the faceless above him isn't more concerned with _that _than they are with _him_, and tries to at least turn his head to locate the source of the sound that courses throughout his chest. His attempts are in vain, however, as it seems that even the motion of his neck has been restrained from him; he realizes - as the cold marble face above him seems more and more diabolical and a gloved hand enters his plane of view and his lungs heave faster and faster – that the earthquake sounds that drum on his ears are the ragged vibrations of his own breathing.

Five white fingers grow larger and closer, and he shuts his eyes just as the sticky latex adheres to the side of his face. It grabs roughly, pinches, really – but he is at least withdrawn to the comfort of darkness. He hears a garbled voice says _something, _but instead of trying to interpret the voice, curls farther inside himself, hoping a daydream might deliver him from the cold steel beneath him and the colder eyes above him.

The hand is gone and he hopes it is over. But just as it is removed, another spider-trap finger is prying his mouth open with bruising force. A couple drops of something heavy fall into his mouth and the finger retreats with haste.

He immediately recognizes the taste, as it is something he is intimately familiar with. However the circumstances could not be more different –

_The faceless are pushing him back in the room again, dragging him by his upper arms even as he pleads that he is too weak, that they have done too much today. They don't hear him and he is thrust into the large white room, door bolted behind him. His muscles protest and his purpled skin nearly tears as he turns to face the machines yet again. He hopes that he will more successfully dodge their blows during this particular sparring session._

_He can't, of course, with the fractures and abrasions and lacerations all piling on top of him like granite bricks, and it is within the first minute that a machine catches him squarely in the face. He rolls behind it (each damaged vertebrae feeling like little beestings against the floor) and spits out a mouthful of red, knowing well that by the time this is over, his tongue will be heavy and drunk with the stuff. _

_- _and he immediately realizes that the blood is his mouth isn't his.

Unable to do much else, he lets the liquid roll down into his throat.

The change is immediate. He is wrenched from the comfort of darkness and his eyes slam open, able to see ever much more even as his irises tear and morph. He is suddenly aware of every ligament, every tendon, every bone and every fiber of his body, as it all seems to be ripping apart and re-stitching itself with gunshot stabs.

He is screaming and his newly sensitized ears are hammering. Between shaky breaks for air, he can now decipher the voices of the faceless above him, "Eyes were successful" "Nails beginning to emerge" "approximately forty percent complete".

He tries to close his mouth and take his breath through his nose, but finds his lips wet and cut by growingly sharpened teeth.

His body seizes, and he struggles to cover his head with his arms and curl up to minimize the pain. He still can't move at all, though, so he digs his fingers into his palms to at least quantify the brittle tension.

After his breathing has slowed and his hands are warm and wet, the stabbing lessens and he closes his eyes again. The terrible pain is gone, but he still feels foreign, and this newness is bulky. He fully expects, with the sloppy warmth beginning to overtake him, that he will finally slip into sleep. But the voice above him, "Administer the steroids and begin the second step of the procedure" informs him otherwise, and a small prick in his arm bars his mind from retreating any further.

The new drug makes his eyes wide again despite their throbbing protests against the sterile brightness in the room. Above him again are the glasses and mask, and this time the hand accompanying them is holding something thin and silver.

Kamui is too tired to tremble in fear anymore. The most he can do is keep his eyes trained on the tool as it descends downward towards his chest.

After a time he can no longer see it, but very quickly can feel it. The tool is digging into his chest with an icy burn, drawing one line and then drawing another crossing it. He is staring up; up past the glasses and the gloves and even the undead light, staring and hoping _hoping _that this time they are killing him.

He feels the sticky hands plunge inside of him and grasp tightly onto something that makes his whole body _stop. _They lift up, boon cradled inside, and he can see the fingers again as they rise out of him. Through the bleary tears now obstructing his eyes, it almost looks like the faceless is holding a limp red bouquet, trembling in a rhythmic breeze.

_Thump._

The faceless picks a new tool this time, one more recognizable. She holds a pair of scissors –

_- Thump thump thump -_

And holds it up to the veins still dangling between the estranged organ and the abused body –

_-thumpthumpTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP-_

And cuts.

He doesn't scream because he hopes that he is dead. Rationalizing – in those spiraling moments (characterized by the blood now splattering across his brow) – that no human could survive such a wound, he waits for the abyss to claim him.

But he very quickly realizes what these doctors have done to him. He isn't human.

His new flesh – still sore from its transformation, now tears itself apart from the inside, every rip of a muscle like

little

paper

cuts

as nutrients and tissue are sent to the weeping emptiness in his chest. His body hollows out, his limbs are eaten, as the coursing poison now sunken into his being rebuilds his missing organ.

He wastes away and the virus makes a pounding monster in his breast. With each drum-beat shudder of his new heart, an acidic new blood is washed through his stinging veins.

"Congratulations, Doctors." A voice above him, eyes examining with professional satisfaction. It seems the faceless was moved to speech by his involuntary performance. "We have single-handedly succeeded in turning an organic human into a pure-blood vampire of the ancient Monou bloodline. This will no doubt be recorded as a landmark medical achievement."

And it was done.

_He didn't want to look. Already his stomach was bubbling and roiling, and his fingers and toes were numb with cold. But the awkwardness of wielding his own limbs and the deadly pinch of curiosity drove his eyes into the sheet of reflective glass._

_His eyes glowed a gold of nightmares back at him._

_This time he could not stifle the agonized cry that broke loose from his hands pressed against his face and fingers digging little holes in his scalp. He descended to his knees and let his forehead rest on the floorboards, tangling his fingers in his hair as he tried to quell violent spasms washing over him._

_He almost didn't hear the footsteps approaching his door._

_There was a little knock, and he expended all of his energy in remaining as silent as possible, battling the residual quaking now in his hands and feet._

"_Kamui-kun, I heard a sound. Is everything alright?"_

_If Kamui were not trying to suppress his own little tidal waves, he would have noticed the grainy little catches in Subaru's voice._

"_Everything is – is fine," (oh god oh god I sound like a wreck), "I – I just fell." _

"_Oh. Alright." Subaru didn't sound convinced, but Kamui heard the little drops of distancing footfalls._

_His heart slowed in minute relief. His heart – the unwelcome demon now burrowed in his ruined flesh – _

_Each of its convulsions filled him with rot._

_He wanted to rid himself of the parasite right then, to rip it free from his chest, but he had used the last of his remaining strength to shatter the mirror on the wall._

_His own yellow eyes haunted his dreams like ghostly goldenrods against the night. _

* * *

><p><em>Dearest Readers,<br>_

_I hate everything about this chapter. Yet, after nearly four re-writes, this was the least disappointing result. I can no longer stand to stare at it and must go on to writing other things.  
><em>

_What bothers me is that I can't determine why I hate this chapter. Perhaps I grow weary of the lack of character interaction in these flashbacks. I understand that the last few chapters have created a bit of a lull in action, and I hope to soon change that.  
><em>

_Please let me know what you think in a review! Reviews help me improve my writing!  
><em>

_Ever Yours,  
><em>

_Elegy  
><em>


	12. Serenade to Silence

XII. Serenade to Silence

Subaru is once again sitting on the edge of his brother's bed, however the room is a little fuller this time and the air is a little more brittle. Seishirou, in a chair to his right, taps his fingers a little impatiently against a bed stand. Hokuto, in a chair to his left, looks at everything – anything, anything but Subaru.

Kamui stirs just a little and once again Subaru thinks that it's finally time, those eyes will finally open – but again Kamui settles and the room remains undisturbed.

"If he doesn't wake up within ten minutes," Seishirou remarks to no one in particular, while glancing at an unidentifiable device around his wrist, "I'm going to have to start worrying."

Subaru shrugs because he is already worrying, has been worrying, since they sat him down five days ago –

_He is seated at a little table, Seishirou directly across from him. Hokuto has dragged the other chair a short ways away from the table and is pointedly not looking at him. The light above their little arrangement is swaying, swaying because Seishirou had to grab it to turn it on._

"_Who are you?" Seishirou finally asks._

_The question makes him angry. It especially makes him angry because he wanted to be the one asking that specific question._

"_I am Sumeragi Subaru, first prince of the Sumeragi blood line and heir to the throne of New Scania."_

_A silence follows. _

"_And who are you?"_

_He finally sees this Hokuto looking him up, and then down, and then up again slowly, as if considering his words. The crinkle in her nose suggests that she doesn't like them._

"_I am Sakurazuka Seishirou, a scientist. This is my colleague, Sumeragi Hokuto. Also a scientist."_

_The little light on the string moves back and forth, back and forth, shifting their shadows across the walls. _

_Seishirou looks like he is about to ask another question. Subaru doesn't let him._

"_Who are you to Kamui?" The tone of his voice drops, drops and any pretense of friendliness is lost. _

"_We should be asking you that-," Hokuto snarls, but stops as Seishirou lifts a hand. _

"_We both served on the team that created him." He remarks, no emotion, just a blank stare. _

_Subaru stares as the shadows dance on the walls. _

"…_he didn't tell you?"_

_Subaru sighs. "So this is his home world, then?"_

_Hokuto squirms uncomfortably, and Seishirou seems taken aback by the statement._

"_You shouldn't say things like that here," Seishirou says slowly, as if tasting the words as they leave his mouth, "the wrong people might hear you."_

_Subaru closes his eyes as Seishirou speaks. He imagines the little bulb above them is still moving back and forth and their shadows are now a twisting court in the cube of the room. _

"_We are leaving when he wakes up." Subaru states, and looks into Seishirou's face for a reaction. _

_He doesn't get one from Seishirou, but he can feel the heat of Hokuto's glare on his skin. _

"_That would be inadvisable." He finally says, and the look on his face is at least a hint apologetic._

_The shadows on the walls seem to move faster and more condensed. Subaru restrains his eyes from streaking a glowing gold, but he allows a little royal malice to seep into his voice. _

"_And why would that be? He will not be remaining here." There is finality to his statement, a closure that he learned through centuries of robes and crowns and courts. _

"_Kamui," the name seems awkward on Seishirou's tongue, "is going to be different. Things are going to be different. I'm not sure he will be able to survive outside of this environment."_

"_What does that mean?" The authority starts to slip, slip._

"_The wound did severe damage to his larynx. I was already sure, when we first treated him, that his vocal folds were irreversibly destroyed. This in itself is not a fatal handicap, as I imagine he is able to telepathically communicate, at least with you."_

"_Wait, he…"_

"_He can't speak. This, however, is not the most severe result. I am more concerned that he has lost the ability to swallow."_

_The little light has finally come to rest, hanging from the ceiling._

"_I don't know for sure. The damage was extensive, and if he has retained the ability to swallow, it will always be painful. You must understand, Subaru-kun-."_

"_Subaru-san."_

"_-Subaru-san, then, you must understand that Kamui might not be able to feed normally ever again. At least if you remain here, we have the ability to supply him with nutrients in other manners."_

_Subaru has no words to say._

"_If you were to leave, and land in another world with less advanced technology, Kamui could potentially starve to death."_

_Subaru thinks for another moment, as the atmosphere becomes thicker and heavier and the little light can barely pierce through the dark. _

"_Fix him."_

_A long sigh, and Seishirou's head is finally in his hands. _

"_Oh, Subaru-san, how I wish I could. He is the one creature – in this entire world – that my technology can never fix."_

* * *

><p>Because there is something sickening familiar in the glint of the glasses above him (three bright white lights and then the blank reflection in two panes of glass) and the precise slate angles of the room (and how they felt when they smashed against his ribs) – there is aura that resonates of <em>home.<em>

His sore limbs do not respond to his panic, and his attempt to say or scream or YELL leave his mouth hanging agape and his neck running fire down his windpipe.

Unable to move and unable to speak, he lets forth his horror in a hurricane of energy -

_NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO _

Subaru grabs his head as Kamui's mental assault hits him. Suddenly he is filled with Kamui's high octave shriek –

_NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO _

_- Foreign memories of empty rooms without doors and large, eventual machines churning gears that smell of pitch-_

_NO NO NO NO NO NO NO _

_- the stinging smell of alcohol and the rheumatic throb of a broken bone –_

_NO NO NO NO _

_- crushed ribs and torn flesh and twisted ankles – _

Subaru launches his consciousness into Kamui's, flying amidst torrential gales of glowing blue energy that tears his spiritual flesh like desperate, long nails. He allows his own energy – little green tendrils that creep gracefully alongside him – to extend their reach and hum a deep tone. Empathy, empathy, empathy – he was always very good at it.

With Subaru's gentle encouragement, the blasts calm and the assault becomes a little less aggressive. Subaru continues a little easier to the glowing center of Kamui's consciousness, prepared to dive into it and fish out the boy's reason himself.

He halts his approach though, as the winds finally die and a thin, blue thread deliberately twists itself about his shoulders.

And he hears that voice.

It is little, apprehensive, sad, pained and maybe even angry. But all that matters is _the voice._

"_Subaru?"_

And immediately Subaru lets everything drop except his tight hold on the thin thread that connects himself to his brother. He allows his senses to return to the material world – the world where gravity works and things hurt and Seishirou and Hokuto are watching with wide, trembling eyes and where they are stranded and Kamui can't speak- and grasps his brother's face with both hands.

"Kamui," he says aloud – the first one to say anything aloud, "Kamui."

He looks down into his brother's eyes – finally open, glowing that velvet shade of violet that hung in the skies of his dreams for the past week. His hands are trembling as they stroke Kamui's cheeks, almost disbelieving and so so relieved. Really, so relieved.

"_Subaru?" _Kamui questions again, even more tentatively as he looks up from between his brother's shaking hands, "_Why?"_

Rather than hear it, Subaru senses the myriad meanings behind the simple question, _why am I alive? Why can't I speak? Why are we here?_

_Why are you crying?_

"Because," Subaru begins, not caring that the questions were never voiced and that Seishirou and Hokuto are still watching, "Because I wouldn't let him take you!" And suddenly he is angry. "Because I won't let him take you! You…you idiot! Child. You are a child, just a child!" And suddenly his voice is much louder and his grip on Kamui's face is much tighter. "Don't you ever do that again, do you understand? None of this self-sacrifice nonsense. Did you honestly think it would work? DID YOU HONESTLY THINK I WOULD BE ABLE TO GO ON WITHOUT YOU?" And suddenly the silence in the room is much, much louder.

Subaru releases Kamui from his hands in favor of stifling his tears with the bottom of his palms. He feels a gentle nudge on his back, and this time it's Kamui's energy that is humming lowly and trying to spread empathy, empathy, empathy – something he's only good at when it comes to Subaru.

"_Hey," _he hears, even quieter than before, _"Sorry."_

Subaru lowers one hand to card through Kamui's distraught hair. "Why?" he asks.

He feels Kamui's sigh mentally, and notices his brother's eye contact has shifted. He returns his hands to Kamui's face, directing his chin up and his eyes back on his own.

"Why?" he asks again, this time a little more softly.

"_Because I love you." _Subaru almost breaks in half with those words that sting his very core. _"And because _somebody _once told me that I'm young and stubborn and blah, blah, old people talk." _

Subaru can't resist smiling at that last one, the mirth swells in him once he realizes that despite the desperate state, it is still his lovely, young little Kamui lying next to him, ready to complain or roll his eyes or do all sort of other bratty, endearing things.

"I forced us out as soon as I was able to get to you," Subaru continues, finally in a position to calmly answer unasked questions, "but you were almost gone by then. We landed here, with these people that know you. They…saved you when I couldn't, Kamui. Don't be too upset with them."

Kamui looks past him at Hokuto and Subaru, as if finally seeing them. Seishirou seems almost amused, with a smile just barely concealed by the tranquil features of his face. Hokuto, on the other hand, seemed a little horrified or at least unable to move.

"Your neck-"

"Larynx." Seishirou interjects.

"Yes," Subaru says a little shortly, "Your larynx was severely injured, and for reasons I didn't quite understand," his voice grows darker, "they can't quite fix it entirely."

Kamui's face grows a little sad, but not terribly unsurprised. _"So I can't speak?" _

"No."

"_Oh."_

Silence again.

"_Can we leave now?" _

Subaru lets his answer flow to his brother via energy, _"No. You're still too injured."_

"_We can't stay here!"_

"_I know that, Kamui. But you can't even walk yet."_

"_Yes I can! If we stay here, they'll find me."_

"_No you can't. And the final answer is no. Just…just until you're a little better. We're safe here for now. As much as I don't like it, those two seem trustworthy enough. For now."_

"_How can you say that?"_ There is a little heat behind Kamui's voice, _"Do you even know what they've done?!"_

"_Yes." _Kamui blinks once. Then he blinks again.

"_How?" _he asks.

"_They've told me a little of it, at least. And as appalling as it all is, they won't lay a hand on you. I won't let them and they know that. So we need to stay here until you are at least stable, so we can have a chance at survival in the next world."_

A long silence floats again, and then, _"I'm scared."_

Subaru feels a little pride in hearing that, only because he knows that he is the one soul in existence that Kamui would admit that to.

"You'll never be alone again, little brother." Subaru lets these words sing aloud, to make them concrete and irreversible.

"H-how," Hokuto stutters, looking back and forth between the two vampires as if it was the first time she is thinking about liking them, is even _considering_ liking them - "How long have you two been traveling together?"

"Lifetimes." Subaru answers automatically, answers without even looking up at her.

* * *

><p><em>Dearest readers, <em>

_I present you with my latest chapter. I am glad to say that the pace of this story shall be increasing, from here on out! Thank you for sticking with me for so long, and reviews are always appreciated._

_Ever yours, _

_Elegy_


	13. A Crime of Blood

XIII. A Crime of Blood

Kamui is yanked from his semi-unconsciousness by a thousand tiny little fires on his head, ignited as he is tugged roughly into a sitting position by his hair. He fights a relentless thrum of nausea – induced by being upright for the first time in _days – _and focuses on the steady wetting of his scalp as sharp nails plant deep enough to draw blood. In the few suspended milliseconds as he hovers between sleep and wake, he deduces that the situation itself makes very little sense and determines, as he fights to budge his eyelids, that he should be prepared to stare straight into the face of a crisis.

The feeling of a second razor hand, shredding the front of his shirt and lightly ribboning the skin of his chest, provides a slice of pain through the final shackles of deep sleep and allows him the strength to open his eyes.

The sight of Fuuma's face fractures his barely re-assembled heart.

It doesn't matter that this clearly isn't _his _Fuuma - _No not my Fuuma, not anymore, not ever _my_ Fuuma – _it means little that the face and body are leaner, younger, and the eyes are a golden reflection of his own – the existence opens the wounds just the same.

"I'm here," this Fuuma says, his lips drawing back to reveal small glimpses of fangs, "to take back what doesn't belong to you."

Kamui hisses loudly to drive back the tears and flings himself out of the bed and away from Fuuma's hands and Fuuma's voice and Fuuma's eyes. Spindly limbs rip from numerous IVs and a metal rack crashes to the floor as he tears himself away. He manages to press himself against the far wall, although his undernourished muscles tingle violently and his shaky legs barely keep him standing.

Fuuma remains seated on the bed for a moment, looking like a night-shrouded demon in his contoured black clothing all dripping in glittering fiber optic cables and twinkling aluminum hardware. Suddenly the sky is falling and Fuuma is flying at Kamui, his long nails extended and teeth openly bared.

Kamui barely manages to raise his own talons to block Fuuma's, but the collision presses him back painfully far into the wall. Fuuma's face is entirely too close to his own, and he can read the lines of frigid fury around his amber eyes.

His arms begin to tremble with the strain of holding Fuuma back. Fuuma's forearms, pressing against his own, start to show a similar weakness, belying the indifferent expression on his face. He speaks again with cold contempt, "What, not even a hello?"

With a great heave of effort, Kamui throws his body forward and manages to knock Fuuma off balance. He give him a swift kick to the abdomen, hoping to topple the giant – but finds himself falling as well, as a hand has snatched his wrist in a bone-grinding clutch.

With a resounding _snap _he lands on his back, Fuuma hovering over him and looking even angrier than he did previously. At least, Kamui notes with a little satisfaction, he appears to be a little less self-assured. That inkling of reassurance, however, dissipates when he feels a hand settle on his throat.

His wound, the tender and delicate flesh, feels splintered and jagged even at the lightest touch. Kamui cannot but help but thrash in panic, but his actions do nothing to relieve him of his agony and the pressure increases.

"Do you know how long," Fuuma remarks with audible satisfaction, "it has taken me to find you, you little_ snake_?"

Kamui can only toss vainly in agony. He can feel the delicate architecture of his freshly healing organs being crushed and his mouth filling with blood.

A finger from Fuuma's unoccupied hand trails up his torso and lands on his upper chest. "I am going to take this heart back from you," he says, digging his finger in a little, "Kotori's blood should never have been sacrificed to make such a _vile _thing."

Kotori.

Kotori's blood.

_Kotori's blood and the blinding lights and something being torn from his chest._

Fuuma's eyes narrow and his fingers clench tighter around Kamui, "Kotori should never have been sacrificed to make _you._"

_Cold air, cold table, cold eyes, cold bright lights directly above him – faces shielded with surgical masks and glasses -the sterling sterile glint of scalpels and drills, the stinging smell of disinfectant. _

"_Has the contaminant solution been acquired?"_

"_Just recently. We have extra."_

"_How much was extracted?"_

"_More than we expected. 4.8 liters."_

_A small chuckle, "She was quite the bleeder."_

_She was._

_Was._

Kamui is hit with realization. Resentment, bitterness and anger overwhelm his senses and trigger a long dormant power in the back of his mind. His skin becomes scalding as magic runs its way through his body and down his veins. Fuuma draws back as if burnt, but Kamui follows him and wraps his thin fingers tightly underneath his chin. With a great, broiling surge forth, Kamui obliterates any mental defenses Fuuma had conjured and dominates his consciousness with his own.

_You are from the Monou. _

His telepathic voice reverberates through the stunned silence of Fuuma's mind. He receives no denial. Fuuma is tugging on his hand, trying to pry it from his face.

_It's your fault. _

Kamui pushes Fuuma over roughly and moves to straddle him. Then, with all the force of magic he can muster gathered in his fist, he punches Fuuma squarely in the face.

_You are the reason they did this to me!_

Another punch to the jaw, this time Fuuma _oofs _as the fist connects. Already his cheek is swelling -

_YOU did this to me and then you have the nerve to even come NEAR me -_

One small hand tries to strangle, while the other punches again, this time in the side of the nose -

_You RUINED ME –_

Fuuma swipes upward as Kamui prepares another punch, managing to catch Kamui in the arm. Kamui tumbles backward, sleeve falling off and arm weeping blood, before re-charging a now kneeling Fuuma.

Fuuma blocks violently and roars, "I will end you, you little _BASTARD_."

Fuuma lunges directly at Kamui, but the latter swings around and manages a shallow scratch on Fuuma's abdomen. He drives another mental attack, letting angry words boil into Fuuma's mind.

_YOUR VILE BLOODSUCKING CLAN-_

He is interrupted by a wave of blackness that quite nearly erases his consciousness as the last of his magic fizzles away. Once again his limbs are assaulted by the pinching sting of injury, fatigue and blood loss. He barely rolls his way out of a punch and watches a second one descend as Fuuma yells, "INSOLENT LITTLE-."

A green wave of energy dissolves the rest of his words and pins both vampires into the floor. Kamui allows the power to seep into his body as he recognizes, with some relief, his twin's signature. He clings to awareness, but allows his eyes to close and limbs to relax. He distantly hears the sounds of Fuuma's struggling and Subaru's demand, "Restrain him" made to either Hokuto or Seishirou, he doesn't know.

The power around him turns into something gentler, and he feels Subaru's hands carefully inspecting him for injury. They delicately prod around the slashes on his arm and then shift around the shredded remains of his shirt to examine the small punctures on his chest. He feels the soothing fingers clench slightly as the scrutiny lands on the reddening bandages on his neck. Soft thumb pads move to wipe the blood from his lips and chin.

"_Kamui?"_

He hears quietly, on the very edge of his mind. With the seconds, his weariness grows. Too exhausted to answer, he allows his emotions and memories to flow to his brother through thin tendrils of glowing magic. The heartbreak, the confusion, the anger and the pain – Subaru accepts them all with little trouble, skilled at empathy as he is, and pulls his brother's head into his lap as a response.

"This is certainly a surprise." He hears Seishirou say. He feels Subaru's indignant rage arise at the comment.

"Why haven't you killed him yet?" Subaru says, using what Kamui has lovingly termed his 'Angry King' voice. Or sometimes his 'Hungry King' voice, too.

"Things aren't so simple when it comes to killing people, Subaru-san." Seishirou responds with a disturbing nonchalance. Kamui can sense his brother's frustration rise by the growing friction in the air.

"I never thought someone like you would say that."

"You confuse me with a stranger from another world, Subaru-san, one who shares my face."

"I should hope that is all you two share." And despite the cutting response, there is an undertone of apology.

"So your recommendation, Subaru-san, would be to kill him?"

"Yes."

Kamui would smirk if he had the ability. He tries, with the remaining strength of his imagination, to imagine the look on Fuuma's face as his brother and his ward discussed his fate. He hopes the emotion is in the vicinity of 'terrified' or 'aghast'.

"And do you confuse him, too, with a stranger from another world? Is he deserving of death at our hands?"

This time it is Hokuto's voice, small but unwavering against the silence. He expects to feel another growing tide of anger from his brother, but it never comes.

"Whether or not he shares the face of another, he has been found attacking my injured little brother, unprovoked, during our absence. I see this as plenty reason enough."

Hokuto responds, he knows that she does, but the voice has become too quiet for him to distinguish. Subaru's next statement is even softer, and he realizes that it is _his _grip on reality smoothly sliding further away as opposed to the voices. His last action, before he takes the plunge into blackness, is to wonder if Fuuma will be alive when he wakes.

* * *

><p><em>Dearest Readers, <em>

_The actual title of this chapter should be "I'm bad at fight scenes" because it would be more accurate. However, I'm glad that the pace of the story is finally able to accelerate a bit. Also, this Fuuma is one of my personal favorites.  
><em>

_Thank you for staying with me this long! I appreciate all reviews.  
><em>

_Sincerely yours,  
><em>

_Elegy  
><em>


	14. Black Holes and Worm Holes

XIV. Black Holes and Worm Holes

Despite his gentle persona, there are a surprising amount of things that Sumeragi Subaru _hates. _He hides it well - and next to Kamui, any attitude would look angelic. But indeed he maintains a well-ordered list entitled _The People, Places and Things that I Loathe_. This list, of course, exists solely in his mind and its contents are known only by his demonically clever little brother.

And while Kamui didn't need any assistance in uncovering the list (the boy could be alarmingly perceptive when he applied himself), Subaru had long since learned that his twin would never understand how much he had _altered _this list.

Before his world and family and innocence and all other sorts of things had been shattered, the number one thing on this list had been arranged marriages. He was always worried, as a prince, that one day some foreign princess would be plopped strait onto the castle doorstep and he would have to grow up and wear itchy clothing and call her things like _honey _and _dear. _He had realized at a relatively young age that princes were a powerful commodity and his eventual marriage was not being delayed by his own disinterest, but by the mediocrity of the current offers. His loathing became deeper when he finally comprehended that Hokuto would also face an arranged marriage, and that she would be sent off to some strange husband far away.

Because, at the time, he could think of nothing worse than losing his beloved sister to a loveless marriage, he prayed and hoped that something would prevent it. That something happened, though, and suddenly he found himself in the difficult position of rearranging his list. To make matters worse, he found that his number one thing on _The People, Places and Things that I Loathe_ and his number one thing on _The People, Places and Things that I Love_ were the same. He couldn't decide if Seishirou had taken more from him than he had given and instead opted to run away to another world with the discrepancies unresolved.

Unfortunately another discrepancy fell – kicking and screaming – into his arms.

During the first week of their co-inhabitance, Subaru tried to remain optimistic about Kamui. He explained away the sour expressions and constant backtalk with the shock of inter dimensional travel. He always (well, sometimes) tried to be on his most amiable behavior, but the stranger resisted all attempts at civility and company.

The second week came and already Kamui was creeping up on his list of hates. The boy resisted any type of interaction beyond that which was necessary. He responded to questions with a snarl and the barest minimum of acceptable answers. He repelled physical contact, eye contact, even humor seemed elusive. Subaru would walk into a room and Kamui would pointedly walk out.

By the third week, Subaru's patience met its end. He gave up on any types of reconciliation or even civility, and joined in the passive aggressive warfare. And it seemed that Kamui was only getting worse – more irritable, quicker to anger, more sensitive to sound and movement. It frustrated Subaru to the point of spite. He made sure to do everything as loudly as possible, from closing doors to walking and cleaning. And he started calling Kamui things like _brat_ and _boy_, just to see his nose pinch in indignation.

The forth week came, however, and Subaru was sure that something was _wrong. _Kamui's behavior wasn't what alerted him – he was convinced that the boy was just born with a bad personality – but seeing Kamui stumble into a wall after a short conversation that consisted mostly of grunts and insults concerned him.

And then Subaru began to wonder.

That night Subaru stayed in. He waited on the couch, book in hand, listening for the inevitable rustling of sheets, slam of the porch door, or sliding open of a window. But only deep silence filled the night, until the distant Eastern sky was birthing orange.

_It shouldn't be my business. _Annoyance, frustration and a hint of dread settled over him. The yellow disk shattered the horizon and cast squares of molten light against the darkness of the room.

The pendant around his neck felt suddenly heavier. _He shouldn't make it my business. _

The emotions settled in his stomach, and he decided now was as good a time as any to deal with the problem - before the anger festering underneath it all made his temper irreconcilable.

He began by rearranging all of the furniture in the living room by dragging the pieces across the wood floor and dropping them in their new locations. Loudly. When no sound could be heard from Kamui's room across the hall, he moved on to 'cleaning' the kitchen by picking up stacks of pans and dropping them in their previously locations. Loudly.

Finally, after fifteen minutes of incredibly diligent housework, he heard a thud from Kamui's room followed by the sharp crack of a door slamming. Kamui all but staggered into the kitchen perhaps looking slightly worse than Subaru had anticipated.

"What are you doing?" Kamui's voice sounded like paper tearing. He leaned against the wall and fixed dark-ringed eyes on his travel companion.

"Good morning, Kamui-kun!" Subaru replied with the most unpalatable cheerfulness, and then proceeded to drop a metal tea pot, "I was just rearranging the kitchen a little!" A large cast iron skillet followed. Kamui flinched as it made contact with the ground.

"Is there any particular reason why you are doing this at this time of the morning?"

"Well, you see," Subaru picked up a large metal serving spoon, "I'm always so energetic the morning after I feed."

Kamui's face tightened in – shock, Subaru thought, or maybe guilt or disgust (it was pretty hard to tell). Kamui then issued a low growl and turned to leave.

A metal serving spoon lodged itself in the wall directly next to his head.

"Kamui-kun." The cheerfulness, however fake, was gone. Kamui turned around and hissed, "Be careful with Sorata-san's silver-."

"Oh, like you give a damn about Sorata's silver wear!"

Subaru marched over to Kamui faster than his eyes could comprehend. He grabbed Kamui by the front of his shirt – with controlled (he hoped) authority- and drug the idiot boy into the living room and onto the couch. Subaru loomed above him.

"Now tell me, Kamui-kun," he made an attempt to re-lace his voice with sweetness and was mostly unsuccessful, "Are the humans here not to your liking?"

Kamui's eyes immediately flashed gold and his fingers grew into the stuffing of the couch. "No!" He snapped, baring his fangs, "It isn't any of your business!" He made to stand up again but Subaru shoved him back with a foot.

"It's my business, _brother dear_," he grabbed a fistful of Kamui's hair, "because you need to be healthy and able to travel across dimensions. You heard the witch, we cannot travel alone. And you aren't of any use _dead._"

He let go of Kamui's head. "When was the last time you fed?"

No response. Kamui glowered at the ground.

"I'll ask you one more time. When was the last time you fed?"

Kamui kept his silence.

"Fine. If you don't plan on answering questions, then I'll drag in the first human I see and force feed you." Kamui looked up to respond to the challenge, but stopped at Subaru's own glowing eyes.

"And you know I can."

Kamui's eyebrows dropped. He crossed his arms and redirected his gaze at Subaru's feet again. He mumbled something at an unbelievably low decibel.

"Speak up, Kamui-kun."

"I haven't." He muttered quietly.

"You haven't what, Kamui-kun?"

"I haven't fed."

"Yes, we have established that. Since when, Kamui-kun?"

The sun hoisted itself completely above the horizon and free into the sky, illuminating the air and causing Subaru's silhouette to glow.

"Never."

_Oh._

"You've never fed?" Kamui's brow wrinkled, but he stayed silent.

Subaru knelt down on a knee. He placed hands on both of Kamui's shoulders, trying to calm both the reticent baby vampire and his own expanding horror. "When were you turned?'

With that, Kamui's eyes lit on fire again and he pulled away. "That is none of your business. None of this is! I don't need to feed! I-" his voice broke pathetically, "I won't."

Subaru replaced his hand on Kamui's shoulders and forced a finger underneath his chin. "I don't know what they told you in your dimension, _child, _but vampires are not immortal. If you do not eat, _you will die._"

Kamui tried in vain to again pull away. He sucked in a deep breath and closed his eyes. "I never wanted this. I don't want this!"

"But you want to live." Subaru whispered. Kamui opened his eyes in surprise. "You came to the dimensional witch. I do not know your reasons. But you would not have wished as you did if you did not want to live."

"But not…not like – not like this, I don't -"

"I have never been a human, so I cannot say for certain. But I do not think that the life we lead is so barbaric, so repulsive, as you imagine. I'm sure that you can find something here - in this world and of this species - that will make life worth living."

Kamui retained his defensive body position, but defeat had already settled in the corners of his eyes. "But, eating people…humans…"

Subaru sighed and let his hands drop. He was beginning to fathom the degree in which Kamui was entirely ignorant of his own species.

"They don't have to – they don't usually die. I'll show you. And it gets better. The taste, I mean. You'll get used to it."

Subaru didn't expect an answer. He turned towards the window and watched as the peach in the sky began to relinquish to blue.

"In my country," he started, "first feeding is a ceremony. Music, dancing, really uncomfortable clothing." He hoped he hadn't imagined the soft snort he heard from behind him. "The humans and the vampires mingle, because both race has a child coming of age.

And afterwards, you and your human partner go off, alone…my first partner, I had known her since I was very young. She came from a country up North. Pale, pretty, a little devious at times. She had visited the castle pretty often.

I was afraid, more so than her, I think. But she had some special wine to calm her nerves. She just stood there, and I just fed, like our respective mothers had taught us. And it was over quickly. When I was finished I wrapped her neck like I was told. She thought it was funny that I dropped the bandage twice. And then she retired to her own room and I retired to mine."

"Tonight," Subaru said, and turned around to find Kamui sullen-faced, "I will bring back a human and you will feed. You need your strength." Subaru took the subtle inclination of Kamui's head to be assent.

Kamui spent the rest of his day tucked away in his room. Subaru imagined that he was trying to immortalize, somehow, the last fading minutes of his already surrendered humanity. Subaru spent the first half of the day putting the furniture back where it belonged and prying a metal spoon out of the drywall.

As dusk fell late in the day, Subaru left silently out his bedroom window to hunt. He had found the surrounding areas to be plentiful with solitary, combat-ignorant humans, and had yet to encounter a problem ensnaring one for a late dinner.

He chose his prey a little less arbitrarily that night, not wanting to drag back something that the little young brat couldn't bear to sink his virgin fangs into. That immediately ruled out any females or children, because during a first feeding was the worst time to discover whether Kamui was either particularly chivalrous or embarrassed. A man, then, but not too skinny or small – they didn't want to have to worry about taking too much accidently.

Subaru settled on a lone man, fairly tall, young and built, taking a shortcut home through a park that night. Subaru descended on him from a tree and had him rendered unconscious before he even hit the ground. Carrying him back was fairly simple, although it was a little inconvenient to sling him over his shoulders considering his height.

When he arrived back at his shared home, the moon was already high in the blue velvet sky. He left the prey on the back porch and snuck quietly inside to summon Kamui.

He found him in the same position from the morning – sullen, head down, sitting defeated and crumpled on the couch. "Come on," he uttered. Kamui followed him into the back yard.

"Hey, Subaru-san." He barely heard from behind him as they stood in the doorway. "What are those?"

Subaru turned to face Kamui, with half a mind to lecture him on stalling, but instead his eyes followed Kamui's outstretched arm into the twinkling night sky.

"Those?"

"The lights in the sky."

"You mean stars, Kamui-kun?"

"I…uh…guess, yeah. What are they?"

Subaru's face softened a touch. "So your world didn't have stars, did it? Mine had many. Many many more than here." Kamui gazed up, and for the first time, Subaru witnessed unadulterated wonder on his face. "I've been told that each one is the center of another world, far away. Who knows, one might even be home."

Kamui continued to gaze upward, and Subaru noted that his eyes were growing glassier. Better to not draw it out, he decided.

Subaru took hold of Kamui's wrist lightly and tugged with restraint. Kamui shuddered, but let himself be led further into the night. They stopped the body lying fairly delicately on the ground. Subaru had already tucked the man's sweatshirt underneath his head.

"Oh my god." Kamui whispered.

"The neck." Subaru responded quietly, and pushed Kamui forward.

Kamui knelt down, only to look back up. "I – I can't." Pearl tears hung desperately onto his eyelids. The distant worlds reflected in his distressed eyes. "Please don't make me. I can't."

"I'm sorry." Subaru said. And he really, truly was. He knelt down next to Kamui, and took hold of Kamui's neck with his most immovable strength. Using his other hand, claws extended, he drew a thin line across the prey's neck. A little ruby gem rose to the surface.

He could feel Kamui shaking beneath him now. In hunger, the boy could smell it. And in fear – terror of that hunger he was sure was consuming him.

He pushed Kamui down against feeble resistance, until his face was right up against the man's neck. And the little beads of misery all strung up in his eyes finally fell, tracing the arcs of his eyelashes and the curves of his face. He didn't make a sound – simply shook and mourned until another soft shove from Subaru encouraged him taste the little blood drop.

There was a notable hitch in Kamui's shaky breath. Subaru could interpret the bloodlust behind it and pushed Kamui's head down even further.

With a defeated sob, Kamui sunk his fangs into taut flesh. Even as he began to feed, tears like little burning crystals coated his cheeks and mingled with the blood on his lips. When Subaru was sure Kamui would no longer resist, he let his hand wander to draw tiny circles on the boy's back and head. As the wails, muffled against flesh, became audible, Subaru began to whisper incoherently about places far away and times long ago. When Kamui was finished – it wasn't long, he couldn't stomach much – Subaru collected the child vampire in his arms and let him cry away his guilt.

From above, the little worlds of light in the galactic tapestry watched as one creature saw his humanity wither away and another

Another perhaps

Saw traces of his return.

* * *

><p><em>Dearest readers, <em>

_So sorry it has taken so long to provide you with another chapter. I have no intentions of abandoning this story! Please enjoy! I'm off to celebrate this momentous occasion with sour patch kids. _

_Sincerely, _

_Elegy _


	15. Aging Lines

XV. Aging Lines

Unfortunately, Fuuma is still alive when Kamui wakes.

Even more unfortunately, he won't _shut up._

Kamui's Fuuma – not anymore, not ever – the other Fuuma – clearly didn't handle defeat the same way this one did. His (not his) would have accepted his predicament with an annoying smile promising underhanded tricks. He would have teased his captors until he saw an opening or weakness. Waited quietly with glittering eyes until backs were turned –

"If you hand him over, I can guarantee your safety under the Monou."

_This _Fuuma seems to be a little less intelligent. Even after he was restrained, even when he was being stripped of his multitudes of devices, he was spitting curses. As the situation began to sink into his _numb skull _his threats became a little more focused _"my family will come after you" _and _"I'll rip your throats out in your sleep"._ A communication device was torn from his ear with a sharp sting and he sung _"I will fucking kill ALL OF YOU." _

During this episode, Kamui's desire to permanently silence him is eclipsed only by his desire to never acknowledge the scum's ugly bastard stupid scummy presence ever again. Wasn't worth his time –

"Any amount of money. Amnesty as well. Just release me and let me carry out my duty."

Oh, if only his vocal chords weren't _mashed potatoes _and his body wasn't as fragile as goddamn baby fairy wings –

"As men of good conscience, you must allow me to avenge my family and my honor."

'_As men of good conscience' _Kamui wants to sneer, _'my family and my honor.' _But the most he can do is blink hard and wrinkle his nose.

Subaru looks about as disinterested as he feels. He sits at the bedside fixing the wall with an intense gaze, seemingly ignoring the pleas from the other side of the room.

"You must allow it! It is the only honorable thing!"

There is earnestness in this Fuuma's voice Kamui has never heard before. He doesn't like that particular shade of _honesty _on him.

Subaru realizes he is awake with a start. "How long have you been awake?" Fuuma, restrained with cords against the wall, looks up with renewed interest.

Subaru slips a tendril of consciousness into Kamui's mind. _How is it? _He asks quietly.

_Hurts. Loud. _Is all he bothers responding.

_Sorry. Seishirou-san won't let me kill him. _

_Will he let me kill him? _Subaru shakes his head.

"Hey! Abomination!"

_Is there seriously nothing we can do to make him STOP TALKING?_

_Seishirou-san tranquilized him earlier, but the boy is incredibly resilient. _

"I know you can hear me!"

_Kamui. _

_Hmm?_

_How did this Fuuma find you? Seishirou-san said this room should kill any tracking devices. _Subaru looked up a little uncomfortably. _Sorry, but you could be in danger. _

_It's fine. _Subaru startled a little in surprise. _I guess there are still things Seishirou doesn't know about vampires. _

_What do you mean? _

_Fuuma and I share blood. _

Subaru's face goes red and his hands ball into fists. _He turned you?!_

_No! No. I – I was turned with his sister's blood. _

_Then what is his quarrel?_

_What is his quarrel? You sound like an old man!_

Subaru snickers. _I am one. _

"Don't ignore me, you sick brat!"

_So what does he want?_

"MURDERER!"

A small explosion of hurt goes off in Kamui's center and Subaru has to retreat completely. Mentally isolated, now, the only evidence of the little disaster is the wrinkle in Kamui's brow. "Sorry." He says out loud, letting a palm rest gently on his brother's head. "Later."

Kamui reaches out a little tentatively. _I didn't mean – _he begins, sounded utterly guilty – _did I hurt you? _

"No." The empath says, honestly, because he didn't. He still pulls away; Kamui's pupils are blown large and panicked. "Shhhh," he says, though to whom or what he is uncertain. "You didn't hurt anything."

Fuuma snorts derisively.

Subaru stands so quickly his chair topples over. He makes his way across the room slowly, deliberately. He stops before Fuuma and looks up at his glowing eyes.

"And what are you, his babysitter?" Fuuma asks contemptuously.

"My current benefactor has asked that I _not _kill you" Subaru says rather calmly, "However, he never mentioned anything about _interrogation._"

"Ha! Someone like you –."

Subaru grabs hold of Fuuma's chin and pulls his face close. Fuuma's neck strains against thin chords and begins to trickle blood. Subaru whispers, quietly enough that Fuuma struggles to hear it, "I met you in another world, you know," his hand tightens on Fuuma's chin, "I tore your face in half."

Subaru then grabs Fuuma's head by the temples and slams it back into the wall. With practiced ease, he smashes his way into Fuuma's mind and barely registers the shattered mental defenses like glass underfoot. He lets a little satisfied sigh slip when Fuuma doesn't even try to conjure a resistance. He didn't use to enjoy this – back when he though empaths were weak and passive. But now he wields his power like an axe as he picks his way through Fuuma's emotions and memories.

The memories do him little good. They are filled with faces he doesn't know, words that sound foreign, objects he can't even begin to identify. The feelings are more relevant to him.

The intent to kill is overwhelming and stark in its purity. Anger and hurt boil underneath it – and hidden deep is an intense, dark grief. And, as often accompanies all these things, everything is colored black with self-loathing.

Subaru retreats and allows Fuuma's head to fall. "But you are not the same as your other self, not at all." He says quietly.

"I know not why you allocate this blame how you do," Subaru begins to pace a little, "but I can assure you it is misplaced, both on yourself and on my Brother."

"Hi-His Brother?" Fuuma asks wide-eyed and terrified, "Impossible. You can't be."

"The depth of your naiveté is astounding."

"We don't have a blood bond. I can't sense you. You can't be his brother."

"Ha! If blood was the only thing that created families, these worlds would be sorry places indeed."

_Subaru – _Kamui reaches out shyly. Kamui's hurt has settled and dulled and only creates a small ache when Subaru relents to connect with him.

_Hmm?_

_Don't tell him. _

_What difference does it make for him to know our circumstances? I highly doubt he will make it out of this room alive, anyway. _

_No! He can't know. Please, I – _a desperation tags onto the end of his plea _– I'll tell you everything, really. He just can't know. Please. _

Subaru sighs and picks his way back to Kamui's bedside.

_No, I don't need that. But I do want something else._

_What? _

_Don't get mad. _

Kamui frowns petulantly. _No promises. _

_Fine. Just listen for a minute, okay? We need you to try and feed._

…_Mmm…_

_There are only so many nutrients Seishirou can give you with this…medical tube thing. You need to eat. You can't heal like this. _

_Oh. Um. Okay. _

_I don't think you understand. _

_No, I'll try. I'm not sure I can swallow well-_

_You need to feed from Fuuma._

_What? Why?!_

_His blood, of course, is the most potent available. Blessing in disguise and all that. It has the potential of advancing your healing process by weeks. _

_I refuse. _

_I know it seems unsavory, but it really is necessary –_

_No! I can't! I WONT! _Kamui tossed on the bed and turned his face away. Subaru begins to pull himself away at the explosion, but Kamui reigns in his disgust. _Sorry. Sorry. I'm sorry. I just can't. He won't agree – _

_He won't have a choice._

_And I can't. _

_You won't either, I'm afraid._

_Don't you understand?! His clan – he – is the reason why I am this way. They saw what _

_was happening, everything, they watched and they knew! They let it happen! THEY HELPED IT HAPPEN. To me and – and – to – her –_

"Shhhh…" Subaru says out loud, putting a hand on Kamui's cheek.

_Someday you will be strong enough to tell me everything and I'll be strong enough to listen. But right now, let's just figure out the quickest way out of this world. _Subaru's tone is so soft, and he moves to block Kamui's view of Fuuma. _You won't even have to see him, okay? We'll make it be alright. _He puts on a little smile just for Kamui. _And then we'll be able to leave sooner. Maybe we'll even land somewhere beautiful! _

And because only Subaru's smile could remedy anything in Kamui's universe, he finds himself propped up in bed with a cup of dark liquid in his trembling hands. Subaru sits next to him, again, just as attentive and pointedly ignoring Fuuma's tranquilized mutters of indignation. Seishirou and Hokuto have joined them, though Seishirou keeps Hokuto at a comfortable distance with a restraining arm. Subaru gives a little nod of thanks.

Slowly and deliberately Kamui brings the cup to his lips. With a tiny shaky inhale he takes a tinier sip. A few seconds drag as Kamui seems to be savoring the taste in his mouth – or, judging by his expression – loathing it – before he makes a noticeable move to swallow.

Subaru is able to grab the cup before Kamui drops it. He places it on the bedside table and turns to his brother. Kamui's eyes are blown wide and sightless, his hands clutch at his throat. The blood, very much un-ingested, leeks from the corners of his lips. He heaves and the rest comes seeping out, running over his hands.

"Stay." Seishirou says to Hokuto, although she hardly looks like she has heard him. Seishirou picks his way over to Kamui's bedside, doing a passable job at hiding his concern.

"Kamui-kun. Does it hurt?" A nod. "Did you swallow any?" Another nod, a little smaller. "Keep going, then."

Both Subaru and Hokuto make a similar gasp in the backs of their throats. Fuuma's eyes, earlier dulled, find a new sharpness.

"I'll hold the cup for you, Kamui-kun. Just focus on swallowing."

"No- " Subaru stops him with an outstretched hand, "I'll do it." He grips the back of Kamui's head lightly with one hand and raises the little glass with the other. But it is just so similar – too similar to that night of Kamui's first broken feed – and his own hand trembles. This time, he can't do it. He sees the regret in the little dimples in Kamui's forhead and knows his own mirror them. Nausea begins to creep up on his consciousness.

Another hand joins his own and steadies him. He looks up, torn between desperation and rage, and sees a replica of his face graced with twenty more years of age. Hokuto would have grown into a beautiful woman, he thinks, and does not brush her hand away. Her eyes offer him silent thanks. He does not tremble under her fingers.

Together they manage to force one third of the glass down, though much of the stuff runs down Kamui's face and stains the sheets in a messy halo. Kamui finally ends it with a great shudder as his eyes begin to water. His throat and shoulders spasm in exhaustion, but he maintains a steady gaze.

The slope of Seishirou's mouth speaks of disappointment, but the man says, "Good." Hokuto stands to join him.

"We'll resume tomorrow. I expect we'll see vast improvement in the healing of your wounds overnight. And, Subaru-san, please attempt to keep Kamui-kun awake for at least a few hours. Just as a precaution." He leaves the room hastily. Hokuto follows, but Subaru thinks he sees her shoot him the sparsest hint of a smile.

Fuuma breathes loudly but remains otherwise silent, He had been, Subaru recalls, rather quiet and alert as he watched a bastard vampire attempt to drink his blood. Now his eyes train on Kamui's bobbing head, seemingly fascinated with the way Subaru prods his brother awake.

"Come, Kamui. You have to stay awake for a little while. Can you do that?"

Kamui opens his mouth to speak and Subaru brushes it aside as habit. No sound comes out, of course, but Kamui looks genuinely surprised. Subaru begins to wonder how far gone Kamui is to the exhaustion and the trauma.

"Just nod for me, can you do that?" Kamui nods apprehensively. "Keep your eyes open for a little while."

Kamui's eyes wander around the room, attempting to find purchase enough to keep him awake. They land on Fuuma, who stares back unflinchingly.

Kamui tries to speak again. He, again, is startled when it doesn't work, although this time he also looks a little frustrated. So instead he lets a little bit of his power seep out, lowly and weakly, into the room. It is faint, but Subaru is positive that Fuuma has latched onto it and hears when Kamui muses internally,

_Why is _he _here?_

Oh god, Subaru thinks, this really would be a horrible time for a delirious Kamui rant.

_I thought he didn't_ – Kamui shakes himself awake – _that he didn't like me anymore. _

Fuuma's eyes widen.

"Shhh, Kamui. It's okay. He'll be leaving soon –"

_You know, Nii-san…_

Nii-san? Subaru wonders as Kamui's head drops and then jerks back up

…_I really think that I…liked him…_

"Shhhh, Kamui, Shhh. It's alright. It's okay –"

"Wha-?" Fuuma growls lowly.

_I let him touch…me…and win…a fight once_

"No, Kamui," Subaru begins to choke on his voice in panic, "It's okay now. It's over, shhh-"

_Or maybe twice_

"Kamui, you need to be quiet now, okay? It will be better soon, I promise, so hush -"

_But he only ever…really…gave me…scars. _

* * *

><p><em>Hi Friends,<br>_

_Thanks for reading. I have started another companion story - a prequel of sorts - called _Cradle of Wreckage. _It details Kamui's life in Acid Tokyo and his relationship with Fuuma. Please check it out if you are interested! _

_Thanks!  
>Elle <em>


	16. The Rise and Fall

XVI. The Rise and Fall

_Drip _

_Drip _

_Drip_

Fuuma hears before he feels. Little echoes of plopping water reacquaint him with his ears. He begins to comprehend that he _is, _that he (as an entity) exists in a separate plane with access to those tools called senses.

_Drip_

_Drip_

The rhythm of falling water rings nostalgic to Fuuma, as if the sound of it should elicit a sight or a memory or a feeling –

And then Fuuma feels the sharp dig of rubble into his back. He feels his limbs, heavy and spent, caught and torn on chunks of concrete and iron. He feels the back of his scabbed head sorely bent against a beam and the steady wet kiss of water dropping slowly onto his face.

_Drip_

_Drip _

_Drip_

_Drip_

The feeling is not entirely unpleasant. But Fuuma ponders, as another little sphere trails a line down his skin, whether or not another feeling should be accompanying the moisture. A stinging, perhaps, sounds familiar, or a burning –

He remembers.

The poison acid water always on his skin his neck his face and flying across the wrecked city spitting out burning saliva crying streams of salt. Tokyo hissing in a downpour and Kamui hissing at him in the downpour all the time stinging water and his stinging lover then Seishirou and Subaru stinging even more. The blood the water the screams and Subaru Kamui. Subaru Kamui and blood. The betrayal.

Fuuma's awake.

* * *

><p>"You aren't supposed to be up."<p>

The words are quiet and barely register across the room. Kamui makes no indication of hearing them, and continues to pace leisurely from wall to wall. Fuuma, now relegated to a "special" type of chair in the corner (_Why do you have this, Seishirou-san? Why do you think?) _Sighs and looks down, before saying (a little louder) and with a certain edge of annoyance, "You aren't supposed to be up."

Kamui looks up to make brief eye-contact, sneers, and continues pacing. Fuuma sighs more aggressively. Kamui's rhythmic footsteps, muffled full as bare skin against the hard floor, begins to dig into Fuuma's ears like little nails.

Fuuma looks up and closes his eyes. He shrugs his shoulders against the restraints on his chair. The tiny footsteps only sound louder.

"Do you _ever _do what you're told?"

"You know, I didn't expect Seishirou's pet abomination to be so…" the pacing ceases, "small."

Fuuma's smiling now, something thin and vicious, but Kamui's isn't facing him.

"Guess Kotori's blood didn't do you too many favors, huh?" Kamui's shoulders tense. "Haha – look where it all landed you!"

Kamui resumes pacing.

* * *

><p>"It's hard to blend in, Subaru-kun, when you are traveling with two <em>identical <em>people."

Subaru shifts a little uncomfortably underneath a foreign gaze, but returns it with a sneer. Hokuto rolls her eyes and punches Seishirou in the arm.

"Your fault. We didn't both have to come."

"Do your people not have _twins?"_

"Clones are more likely than twins here. And clones are highly illegal."

"Even better!" Hokuto snarls.

"You didn't have to come, Hokuto-kun," Seishirou starts a little abashedly –

"Like hell."

"You too, Subaru-san. I could manage this just fine on my own –."

"But this errand concerns me!"

Seishirou rolls his eyes. "I forgot how similar you two were with the other Subaru gone, Hokuto."

Hokuto huffs, but says nothing.

"Let's go. We don't want to leave the children home alone for too long."

The three navigate through a throng of half-people, almost all glistening with metal bits or clanking loudly from various limbs. Subaru begins to watch Seishirou and Hokuto a little more closely, finally spying joints that are a little too rigid to be human.

"Isn't it a little suspicious for three of us to be buying blood packs?" Subaru asks Hokuto.

She opens her mouth to speak, but a bemused Seishirou answers.

"Forgive me, but the two of you are hardly worth being _suspected. _Besides, there is hardly anyone around to get upset over it."

"Local law enforcement, perhaps?"

"There is none here. Not anymore. Besides, if selling blood were illegal, why would we be trying to buy it in a packed marketplace?"

"You seem adamant on Kamui staying inside and away." There is an audible thread of suspicion lacing Subaru's voice.

"Kamui is quite a different case. Even you should know that there is more hunting him than than just _local law enforcement."_

Seishirou is right, of course, and the reminder makes Subaru shiver. The horrible, hulking, semi-sentient machines that chased them through the dimensions could, and certainly would, follow them back here.

"Those machines…then…they came from here?"

Seishirou looks up and then murmurs, "How many times have you encountered them?"

"Almost twenty."

"You kept count?"

"It is not something one so easily forgets."

"Those machines…Hunters…are far beyond what we could create here. But they did originate here. And, once they retrieve their pray, they will return here."

* * *

><p>"You should probably rest and stuff now."<p>

Fuuma breaks the silence, once again, to relieve the little staccato patters of Kamui's feet on the floor. Kamui makes a motion like he's grumbling, lightly kicks the wall, and then falls to a sprawling sit on the edge of his bed.

"So where did you go, anyway?" Kamui crosses his arms.

"Look, I know you can communicate with me, and we're both going to be here a while. Why don't you just -." With a flop, Kamui collapses dramatically back onto the bed, his arms spread wide and his eyebrows perched disbelievingly on the tops of sunken eyes.

"Fine. Whatever." Fuuma stretches out his legs and groans. His muscles ache from the confinement and his patience has long since deserted him.

"I heard you were this much of an asshole to Kotori, too. Never talked to her…hissed at her…hit her once-."

Kamui's in front of him, clutching his face in his shaking hands, his eyes drowning in rancor. "LIAR!" He screams silently and so, so loudly. He pushes Fuuma away aggressively, turns his back, and stomps a few feet away.

Kamui clutches his head and freezes. Fuuma waits and watches. Minutes pass by and finally Fuuma mutters, "Uh…sorry, I guess."

Kamui doesn't do anything, doesn't move.

"I'm still going to kill you, but sorry."

* * *

><p>He isn't in pain, which is bizarre. He distinctly remembers the scarier half of the vampire duo tearing into is face not too long ago. He reaches up with shaking hands to feel around his cheeks, his neck…<p>

"The price has been paid for your healing," a familiar voice says, "But it is not enough to erase the scars."

Fuuma looks up, finally, and sees the dimensional witch staring down at him from a mirror in the air. One long finger extends into his dimension, and from it clear water drips and plops harmlessly, again, onto his forehead.

"Is he alive?" His freshly awakened voice sounds like radio static.

Yuuko retracts her finger. Then she laughs, deep and booming.

"And what should I charge you for that answer, hmmm? You've put me in a rather foul mood, so it's going to be pretty steep!" She's still smiling, but her eyes are cold and serious.

He tries to sit up, but the weight of reality is heavy in his lap. He struggles as his ears grow hollow and the color drains from his surroundings. _Kamui might be dead, Kamui might be dead, Kamui might be –_

"You really are a _child." _Yuuko isn't smiling at all now. "You were not prepared for the consequences of your actions."

He might be alone he might BE ALONE and the tingling in his muscles grows to a prickling and he accidently yells, "He's alive! Tell ME!"

"And why should I?" Yuuko asks unaffected.

"I - " Fuuma pauses to breathe heavily. "Anything. Whatever you want. Just tell me."

"That was not a smart offer."

"Please."

"Ha! I never thought I'd hear you say that word. What good would the information do for you?"

Fuuma thinks. For once, the answer has never been more clear.

"I need to find him again."

Yuuko pauses and closes her eyes. Fuuma waits and watches, beginning to tremble.

"He's dead."

No. NO. Fuuma is torn apart, inside, by the extreme heaviness of a void. He clutches at his chest as the grief, in long and searing waves, starts to consume him. Breathing is hard and his eyelids become heavier with the second.

"You have paid the price." Fuuma looks back up at Yuuko and realizes, by her distorted features, that he has starting crying.

"Remember well the feeling of grief, little hunter." Fuuma barely registers his own curiosity through his agony. "Even as short as it was, it was your price."

Everything freezes. Fuuma's confused. "What?"

"He's not dead, although _alive _might be stretching it in his current condition."

Relief floods warm back into his body and all his limbs are scorched.

"-to find him."

"What was that, little hunter? Speak so I can hear you."

"I have to find him."

"Well," Yuuko smiles slyly, "you're going to have to catch a ride."

* * *

><p>Hello friends and thanks - once again - for reading. If you are interested, I have started a side story detailing Kamui and Fuuma's past relationship in Acid Tokyo entitled <em>Cradle of Wreckage. <em>Please check it out! Also, thank you to my lovely, wonderful reviewers. You guys are the reason I write.


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